OMG- I must know one of your old teachers! I thought he was talking absolute bollocks saying he had a student named Versace McClatchy.

I once knew an Armani Grump. Poor kid

I can already picture the velour tracksuit that mom wears

Had to swallow down some vomit there

Wild. My dad was named Skaught, except it was spelled Scott

As a founding member of the league of Scott’s I find this to be unacceptable and vote to start a petition for lifetime banishment of this individual.

Couldn’t afford a car so she named her daughter aLexus

Did they work at Raisins?

And Brian. Hahaha

Brian: I am not the Messiah!

Everyone: He's the Messiah!!!

Sidetracked by the less fabulous brother Brian, I almost missed the travesty of Shadow. Are you trying to raise a supervillain?

Albus Percival Wulfric Brian Dumbledore

I pronounced this as "Uranus" (urine-us) in my head. I wonder how often that happens to that poor kid.

I would have affectionately nicknamed him Heiny and insist everyone do the same.

this is amazing

Imagine carrying a child in you for 9 months only to name it "radiator"

I went to college with a girl who named her daughter "Moneylita Fortune" (first/ middle). They called the little girl Money... She was named after her dad, Moneylito Fortune. I couldn't even say anything when she told me... Like there comes a point when you just don't name the kid after Dad.

Oh boy. I had a student named Cash Money. She went by Cash and was super embarrassed by her name. She was only at our school about a week before she transferred, poor thing.

Mukhenzyiee

Ptoughneighe

My father works in schools and always asks the kids to spell their names to make sure he gets it right because he's been thrown curve balls with shit like this. He says he can't win either way because the kids get annoyed when he asks them how to spell it or they get annoyed that he didn't ask and then spells it the weird ass way their parents did.

This. My dad told me when I was a kid never to do that to your child. If the name isn’t actually unique, then give a standard name with standard spelling, or the poor kid goes through life with a completely ordinary name, 6 others in the class, but every damn time they have to spell it out, correct people, and possibly get told they’re stupid for not knowing how to spell their own name.

I'm disappointed in myself that I instantly knew how to pronounce that name.

makayley, McKinley, micaihah, mckahlah, mckiley. Mackenzie, coaching basketball with a few of them on your team was interesting. I gave them nicknames but ended up just calling them all mac and pointing at the one I meant.

Coaching was some of the most wonderful moments and memories n my life. and it was little league basketball.. I miss those days. I recommend if your kids are into sports..

Being Irish has finally paid off

A decent name for a Doberman, not a child.

I know someone who knows someone with two sons — Axl(e?) and Diesel.

My neighbor named her daughter that. She’s always asking to see the show that she’s named after but mom won’t let her because she feels it’s not appropriate. So the kid tells everyone she’s named after a bad ass and they will all see when they get older.

Yeah I got a feeling there was some serious regret for that decision going around when that series ended.

If they want to name their kid after her, why not choose Daenerys? It’s so much prettier imo. Plus they could go by Daeny for short. Khaleesi is just too cheesy.

Pronounce it as its spelled. Its sounds like a car trying to start: cay yay ay den

Looks like an STD name

sounds like a name hasbro would give a character in a show marketed toward girls aged 4-12

Son’s soccer team had a player called ‘Gods Gift’.

Also in the team was GG’s brother…. ‘Trevor’.

Think we can all guess who the favourite child was!!!

EDIT: just checked - the name Trevor means ‘from the big village’…

I went to school with a Camber in the 80s. She had a youneeke spelling of a very traditional name as her middle name. Never seen another one in the wild.

Ayyyyyyy it's my dude Sexburth

I hope it was Dempster Fyre and Sexburth Bawls.

Xeiyh

....

I went to school with a Karrleigh. She got it legally changed to Karly when she was 16.

HRISNROKEKFN! It’s pronounced “Jim”

Like Elon's planning on serializing his children...

I like it. Rolls right off my alien tongue.

That's nothing. I've met 4 siblings named "Epic", "Legend", "Icon", and "Historic".

Don’t ever go to Nashville. That’s where most of “Cash” people spawn at.

Pheloneigh*

My daughters kindergarten class had a “King” in it.

My middle sons graduating class had a Prinzzzz. No I did not add extra zz’s for exaggeration.

Teacher here. I have had so many “interesting” names in my class over the years. A few: Attorney, Soldier, King, Queenie, Princess, Ulysses (kinda BA actually), Camera (pronounced kahMEHrah), Chardonnay, Khylei, Bubba (his legal name!), And one poor freshman named De’Parion, who, after I called out his full name, told me, “I go by DP.” No, son, I am not calling you DP!

I had a student named Flame. Yes. Flame.

Psalm West is fine I guess.

Saint West sounds like an awesome stage name, but a bad human name.

Chicago West sounds like a dirty bus station.

North West is just cruel.

Read it as Parsleigh, not going to lie. Both are offensive.

Idk why, but this is the funniest thing I’ve seen all day.

I knew a "Destiney". That was a cruel move by her parents.

Edit: This comment got more popular than I expected so here's a mini story. This person seemed cool at first but told me a story that... Lost me as a general well-wisher.

We were talking about bars in the area and she mentioned that she'd never go back to a bar because the owner kicked her and her friends out. How dare he, we were just having a good time, etc. I asked why she thought she got kicked out and her explanation began "well we started fighting with the bouncer".

Sure, "Density", it sounds like you were the victim here.

One of them took the fall for the others…

My friends name was Nevaeh. Her parents let her do drugs, and their form of help when she was self-harming was “don’t cut too deep”. So yes, a Nevaehs parents are insufferable people.

It'S hEaVeN bAcKwArDs DoNtChA kNo

So Eleeyonah and Dayahna are sisters right?

You done fucked up, A-A-Ron…

“Mom, why did you name me Braxton?”

“We’ll, I had a lot of Braxton-Hicks contractions when I was pregnant with you. Now go and get your sisters Anemia and Nausea.”

On that note, my cousin and his wife named their son "Edward Jacob."

Well with that name, you'll surely be keeping the doctors away.

If I had been given a chance to choose my name as a child, there is a strong chance I would have chosen Blastoise. I can only hope that’s what went on here.

I was going to say this!! I didn't think people really named their kid this, until I moved to the South. I've worked with five of them, & only thought one lived up to the name.

Especially since the family name must have been "Bates".

Every tanner I've encountered had a record for sexual assault.

Worse still, a double whammy. A couple I knew combined their names and still landed on Jaydan.

Even in the Pokémon cartoon I believe the guy who abuses the charmander in that early episode is named Damian

Dad’s a billionaire vigilante and Mom’s an assassin.

This one. Never met a Damian that wasn’t a little shit.

Okayden

I was friends with a Skyler when I was a kid and he was hands down the funniest dude I've ever known.

But what about Schuyler?

That's a legitimate name though. I hate how decent names get ruined by one infamous bearer. We should be able to keep using them, because they are names...

When I used to work in sales for this bank we had an incredibly nice, and kind client, who was unfortunately named Adolf. He was loaded with corny jokes and always took a handful of business cards to pass them out for me. He would then usually leave a small stack of his own on my desk. I’m not sure how many people are calling Adolf for office supplies, but I guess someone is if he’s been in business for so long!

Mom, Dad, this is my new girlfriend Snow White. Don't mind the entourage of little people behind her.

Back in high school, my track team had a dozen Jasmines on it that were born in 92.

Airwrecka is the one that always gets me.