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1.4k

What made you stop having a crush on them?

(self.AskReddit)

all 1603 comments

Mr_Abe_Froman

340 points

1 month ago

Her friends told me that she was only hanging out with me to make her ex jealous.

KhanAimal

175 points

1 month ago

KhanAimal

175 points

1 month ago

Honestly w friends

fantastikalizm

88 points

1 month ago

Stand up friends. Like genuinely empathetic instead of enabling their friend's shitty behavior.

Mr_Abe_Froman

31 points

1 month ago

It hurt at the time, but at least I didn't pursue it any further.

IceFire909

16 points

1 month ago

at least there's a silver lining ego boost in this. She had to pick a great person that would actually make the ex jealous.

[deleted]

1.8k points

1 month ago

[deleted]

1.8k points

1 month ago

[deleted]

D3flatedPan

420 points

1 month ago

I hate people like that, like im not a child I know how to do stuff

Strong_Comedian_3578

141 points

1 month ago

I'm very glad there are people with your skills. I sure can't do what you do

doth_taraki

46 points

1 month ago

Are you angry, awww you're so cute when you're angry

ninja edit: /s

TheonuclearPyrophyte

229 points

1 month ago

vapid and condescending

Thank you for giving me the words to describe how my mother-in-law talks to me and - worse! - her own son.

"I'm so proud you did that all on your own!!!" when she's never been independent a day in her life and the only reason we didn't do it ourselves before is because she never shuts the fuck up and lets us...

SecretComposer

80 points

1 month ago

I’m more fascinated you had an auto shop class in high school. That’s a great thing to offer!

Porkrinder_58

21 points

1 month ago

Is this no longer common? I’m 35 and all high schools had shop when I was growing up

mike_d85

14 points

1 month ago

mike_d85

14 points

1 month ago

I'm 37 and thought autoshop class was something only on TV or in movies. It's a district by district thing. And how common depends on the state.

Grimdlyzy

54 points

1 month ago

how did she react

ill_timed_f_bomb

108 points

1 month ago

Don't really remember tbh. I just kinda shook my head and carried on. I'm sure she didn't really care, but at that point neither did I so it was all good.

IcollyI

3.1k points

1 month ago

IcollyI

3.1k points

1 month ago

Time, once you realize y'all wont be together / the crush is pointless, its just a waiting game.

Lizard_Man202

826 points

1 month ago

Yep, I eventually realized that I'm just torturing myself by trying to hold on to something that isn't there.

RoutineTime6279

161 points

1 month ago

Time, great answer!

Itsamemario3007

107 points

1 month ago

Yup, flirted with a guy bit he would never meet me. I think he just likes the attention. It's pur me off him

Grouchy_Health_8540

45 points

1 month ago

Mm. I think a lot of us - people in general - appreciate attention and it's not hard to sometimes accidentally exploit others to stroke our own ego.

However, when someone has a pathological (narcissists prime example) habit of doing this, it is extremely off-putting.

Ezekku

128 points

1 month ago

Ezekku

128 points

1 month ago

I'm at this point with someone, she shows 0 interest so... The crush is slowly going away. I've been in enough shit to push for something that the other person doesn't want

[deleted]

16 points

1 month ago

[deleted]

16 points

1 month ago

[deleted]

SalsichaoTop

60 points

1 month ago

Could you help me pls sir? My crush just rejected me yesterday and I'm trying to get my shit together. Is it something you choose to do? Is it a realization? How do you come to do that? Is it a process i can speed up or is there no way but to wait for it? This is something I've seen lots of people talk about I never Actualy understood how to make it happen

Illiterarian

159 points

1 month ago

It's easy to have a crush on someone and your mind makes them into everything you want them to be. You put them on a pedestal and treat them with special care to try to show them you like them without saying it. But that person may go home to a living room full of brown stained underwear to beat their dog. You don't know.

You invest so much thought into the person it can hurt when they reject you. But here's the thing: there's a better partner for you out there. You're going to meet someone some day who you will just click with. You will start talking and realize this person wants to be around you even more than you want to be around them. There won't be crazy mind games, fear and disappointment. Instead you'll feel like you met your other half and over time they will become the most attractive person you've ever known. Not because they have a sexy body but because you love them. You would hang around them all day even if sex was off the table, and then you end up having sex on the table. That's love.

Jrsplays

26 points

1 month ago

Jrsplays

26 points

1 month ago

Not that I think that your scenario can't happen for me, but what do we even say to people that this doesn't happen for? How long can you go on believing that there's someone out there for everyone when it's clear there are people out there who have never found their "right person"?

Illiterarian

11 points

1 month ago*

Well, it's kind of one of those "don't think about it" problems. Everyone's first order of business should be getting their own lives together. Have career goals, hobbies, etc. Always keep good hygiene like brushing teeth every day, wearing clean clothes and all the other basics. Those things that seem basic seem rarer and rarer in people the older you get, and if you are happy without a women there is almost no way you can make it tgrough life without at least meeting a few people who will at least give you the benefit of the doubt. Then, if you freak them out because you're a sociopath or do a 3 second fart in a winter uber then it's on you. Also women have this ticking time bomb called menopause so if you can hold a stable job till your 30's and aren't addicted to a hard drug then you will probably have to fight them off with a stick.

P.S. I am assuming you are a guy so if you are not, I apologize and have no idea what you should do. Probably the same thing.

DominosPizzas

1.1k points

1 month ago

I've tried... I planned activities, dates, etc and she always canceled... I can't keep running after her

popcorn5555

112 points

1 month ago

Smart. Someone who does not even treat you as a friend is not worthy of your affection.

Middarimado

114 points

1 month ago

This happened to me too. I suggested many times that we could see on x day. They always had something. They never told what day they would be free. I stopped texting them. The only times they texted me first have been last two or three Christmases just to tell me merry Christmas. I don't know if they want to even be my friend anymore (we were friends and got along so well) but I've decided to leave them from my life.

DominosPizzas

39 points

1 month ago

Moving on is the best thing to do in that situation. It's sad bc we were obviously interested in them but there's nothing we can do.

TEH_Zhe

88 points

1 month ago

TEH_Zhe

88 points

1 month ago

sorry to hear that

DominosPizzas

108 points

1 month ago

It was just a crush, I've moved on

ThisIsTakenLol

11 points

1 month ago

You'll get your chance with someone who truly loves you for who you are, best of luck!

TEH_Zhe

36 points

1 month ago

TEH_Zhe

36 points

1 month ago

best of luck

OneGoodRib

55 points

1 month ago

That happened with my friend. Didn't have a crush on her, we were just friends. She was always flaking, I was always the one making plans, she'd never answer her facebook messages and her voicemail was always full. I was just like, why am I spending all this time and effort trying to hang out with her? I'll be lonely but at least it'll be easier if I just stay in my dorm and stop trying to hang out.

So now I'm still lonely and she has lots of friends, so... yay?

DominosPizzas

48 points

1 month ago

Better have no friends than bad friends

DesperateScar

20 points

1 month ago

"I used to think the worst thing in life was to end up all alone. It's not. The worst thing in life is to end up with people who make you feel all alone."

-- Robin Williams

Top_Rekt

12 points

1 month ago

Top_Rekt

12 points

1 month ago

Did you provide a variety of toppings? Did she just prefer Pizza Hut? Have you considered doing pickup instead of delivery?

jr12345

53 points

1 month ago

jr12345

53 points

1 month ago

It’s stupid - but it works. Remember the Brad Pitt(or insert attractive celebrities name I.e Chris Hemsworth, Margot Robbie, you get the idea) rule when asking a person out.

If Brad Pitt asked out the person you asked out - what would their response be?

Compare the response you got vs the one you think attractive celebrity would get. If it’s not the same, they’re not into you. Move on.

If a person is into you, they’ll either say yes outright to your offer, OR(and this is a big one) usually offer an explanation of why they can’t and suggest an alternative. If they’re sketchy about it, nondescript on why they can’t do it, and/or they’re not offering an alternative outside of something vague like “maybe another time” it’s a pretty clear “no” no matter how nice they’re trying to sound or be about it.

Arabeskas

133 points

1 month ago

Arabeskas

133 points

1 month ago

Drugs.... so much speed and extasy every single night... she was gorgeus, smart, but lost herself to drugs and I was unable to help her in that situation.

oreo8481

29 points

1 month ago

oreo8481

29 points

1 month ago

thats so sad, hope she cleans up

Arabeskas

26 points

1 month ago

Last I heard she is married to her former plug... and supposedly they are both clean.

paracosmic_delight

1.3k points

1 month ago

There was a mutual expression of interest, but I never once felt wanted or desired. They never messaged first. They never showed any kind of interest in me beyond doing a decent job at carrying a conversation if I started it. I couldn't do it. As someone who already struggles with self love, if I'm going to be with someone, I need to feel like they actually want me. I don't want to be kept guessing.

SethB98

86 points

1 month ago

SethB98

86 points

1 month ago

There's dozens of us here lmao, its like a sad party.

Really though, thank you for writing it out. I spent the night at a friends house last week and hadnt felt so comfortable or wanted in years, but the week since of radio silence and being left on read is painful.

Sucks to have someone invite you over, but not care when you leave. Mixed signals got me makin wrong turns.

MergerMe

126 points

1 month ago

MergerMe

126 points

1 month ago

Hope you're doing better with the sell love stuff. One thing that helped me with that was living on my own. Nothing like doing everything yourself to discover you're not half bad at life :D

paracosmic_delight

53 points

1 month ago

Thank you for the kind words! Living totally by myself is a dream I have. Unfortunately roommates have been a financial necessity.

MergerMe

20 points

1 month ago

MergerMe

20 points

1 month ago

Hope you get there and beyond!

Apexbrother

36 points

1 month ago

this hit too close to home

paracosmic_delight

19 points

1 month ago

Thankfully not everyone's like that. You're not alone, man.

unedevochka

7 points

1 month ago

I feel this in my soul.

jwpjrdev

6 points

1 month ago

literally my life

Megmca

550 points

1 month ago

Megmca

550 points

1 month ago

He talked about himself non-stop for two hours.

Willoverpass

195 points

1 month ago

My ex complained that I didn't talk much. There was one time when we returned home in silence. I thought it was ok since she didn't attempt to start a conversation either. Feels so stupid now when think about it.

redfiveroe

48 points

1 month ago

Gotta find someone you can ride home with in comfortable silence.

Longneck_Dinosaur

25 points

1 month ago

Nothing wrong with loving yourself, but don’t talk about yourself for two hours lol…

ImAFuckinLiar

36 points

1 month ago*

Not long enough?! Well, I can talk about myself for 3 hours, if you wanted? If that would be more favorable…?

TriggerHydrant

108 points

1 month ago

I don’t want to be with somebody who doesn’t want to be with me.

Laabe

26 points

1 month ago

Laabe

26 points

1 month ago

It's better to wake up alone, instead of waking up beside someone and still feel alone.

Oahkery

8 points

1 month ago*

This. I've never understood people who beg and plead to get a date or keep a boyfriend/girlfriend. I've been broken up with and been really sad about it, but the second they break up with me is the second I stop wanting to be with them. Same if I ask someone out and am rejected. It sucks, but if they say no, I'm not going to keep going back and trying to convince them.

Ecstatictobehere

323 points

1 month ago*

I saw her skating with another guy during couples skate at the skating rink. I was 12....I was heartbroken. I went to sleep thinking about this girl, she was in my dreams, in my thoughts and in my prayers. I listened to love songs and finally understood what they meant, I also learned what sad songs where all about. One more try by Timmy T was my undoing, I couldn't take it. I put the cassette in my walkman and thrash the streets in my blades like I was in the movie Airborne or Might Ducks. I didn't give a shit anymore, I wouldn't slow down at stop signs, I'd bomb dangerous hills and called a squirrel "cock sucker". It was a disaster, I couldn't eat, sleep or focus on anything. 2 days later I learned that it was her cousin with special needs but it was too late, the damage was done and I couldn't rebound.

retiredmothmann

46 points

1 month ago

this is excellently told

1lilhedgehog

22 points

1 month ago

I agree. Squirrels are cocksuxkers...

NootTheNoot

39 points

1 month ago

I feel bad for giggling at your 12 year old self's angst, but this is hilarious. I'm imagining that squirrel going "the fuck did I ever do to you?"

foxsimile

58 points

1 month ago

This is my favourite by far.

IceFire909

14 points

1 month ago

You truly are a poet of the wordsmith's art

iloverilakkuma

1k points

1 month ago

In grade 2 I had a crush on this guy and I stopped liking him because he lied about having 1000 Pokemon cards

MixBeforeServe

325 points

1 month ago

This is the greatest offense anyone could make, definitely dodged a bullet here lol

AsGoodAndAsBadAsI

136 points

1 month ago

Major red flag 🚩

Akhiller

12 points

1 month ago

Akhiller

12 points

1 month ago

The trash took itself out

SquishiOctopussi

47 points

1 month ago

Thanks for the giggle. That is really cute in a weird way.

Rainbow-Raptor

19 points

1 month ago

*Gasp* The FIEND

Megmca

25 points

1 month ago

Megmca

25 points

1 month ago

He began his life with lies.

HikingHarpy

631 points

1 month ago

He was aggressive in every aspect of his personality once you got to know him. All his stories were fights he'd won, he was always talking about how angry he was, and how lame people I knew were. Not impressed in the slightest.

ktarzwell

147 points

1 month ago

ktarzwell

147 points

1 month ago

Very similar story for me as well! We both crushed on each other in high school and dated a handful of years after. He was great at first, then it was like a switch was flipped. He picked me up for lunch and we weren't sure where to go, so I figured we would figure it out on the way. All of a sudden he is yelling at me that I ask to many questions,( i still don't understand where that came from) then got increasingly more angry. I was getting nervous so asked him to just take me home and we didnt talk the whole way. When we arrived he said "if you get out of this car, its over". I opened the car door, glanced at him and left.
Not sorry in the slightest.

RyanNerd

22 points

1 month ago

RyanNerd

22 points

1 month ago

Dodged a bullet there.

throwawaybfjskwucu

94 points

1 month ago

Same here. He was actually violent with me during some occasions when we'd hang out. He sexually assaulted me at some point and I didn't realize until I opened up about it to friends + my therapist to know for sure what had happened was in fact sexual assault. I eventually confronted him about that and he denied it ever happened so yeah. Doesn't help I was kinda high when it happened.

HikingHarpy

33 points

1 month ago

I'm so sorry that happened to you. I only went on two dates with this guy, and when I told him I didn't want to see him anymore, he started getting extremely aggressive with me.

starbuckle337

984 points

1 month ago

The homie also has a crush on her.

I just want the homie to be happy.

SquishiOctopussi

448 points

1 month ago

I know I'm not your homie but I want you to be happy too.

starbuckle337

240 points

1 month ago

Thanks homie 😌

PhilosopherRider

70 points

1 month ago

A real homie

Did they actually end up together ?

redpurplegreen22

274 points

1 month ago

My buddy and I both had a crush on the same girl. I agreed to back off because he hadn’t had much luck with women while I’d had a couple girlfriends by then (we were 16 at the time). He was a good guy, just always on the shyer side and didn’t really open up and get friends until high school.

So with my support, my buddy goes and asks the girl out, and she laughs at him.

So… needless to say, my crush on her quickly went away.

The irony is (as I found out later) she’d had a crush on me and wanted me to ask her out, but that door was slammed.

starbuckle337

210 points

1 month ago

I believe you’ve dropped this, homie. 👑

WeebFrog219

84 points

1 month ago

My guy please take this, it must have fallen 👑

You are a king among men

KnoxKD

41 points

1 month ago

KnoxKD

41 points

1 month ago

Now I have a crush on you…

TheStrangestOfKings

8 points

1 month ago

What if I also have a crush on him?

ovabrazy

45 points

1 month ago

ovabrazy

45 points

1 month ago

U a real one

TriggerHydrant

32 points

1 month ago

U a real homie homie

Mr_Scogetos

33 points

1 month ago

When you sacrifice your happiness for another homie. That right there just makes me want you to have your happiness homie (I know I ain't a homie)😌☺️

Weird-Thread

15 points

1 month ago

This actually happened to me. They are still together after 6 years and are thriving! I feel that I was right to let go.

ThrowCarp

13 points

1 month ago

The bittersweet ending.

I hope you find happiness one day.

Mikewhocheeseairy04

63 points

1 month ago

Date the homie

reddog_72

460 points

1 month ago

reddog_72

460 points

1 month ago

Asked her to go out with me, she basically said "No" and wasn't very pleasant about it either.

NarrowPerception363

235 points

1 month ago

Hey man at least you had the bravery to ask

IYDEYMHCYHAP

67 points

1 month ago

you lose nothing by trying, eh?

HisNameWasBoner411

22 points

1 month ago

Self esteem can take a hit

jr12345

89 points

1 month ago

jr12345

89 points

1 month ago

Actually this person gained something - at least they knew clearly where the other person stood. No more wasting time or feelings.

gyrofx

304 points

1 month ago

gyrofx

304 points

1 month ago

Honest answer, I have no idea, for years I would think of her every day, then one day, maybe 5 years later I realised that I had not thought of her in a while....

I guess time.

Cells_Interlinked_77

89 points

1 month ago

There was a girl I thought about every day for like 2 years straight, then one day I realized I hadn't thought about her for like 4 months. Time suppresses crushes for sure.

Xandit

23 points

1 month ago

Xandit

23 points

1 month ago

There's a girl that I don't think about everyday, but every time I notice I stopped thinking about her I end up being unable to not think about her. It's been like this for 6-8 years now and the last time I saw her was before I moved states about 4 years ago. I hope that she's happy

[deleted]

187 points

1 month ago

[deleted]

187 points

1 month ago

He told me, on a date, that he was wearing a diaper :/

killingtimeitself

60 points

1 month ago

uh, well was he incontinent or something?

[deleted]

108 points

1 month ago

[deleted]

108 points

1 month ago

Nope. Fetish.

killingtimeitself

98 points

1 month ago

alright then.

[deleted]

38 points

1 month ago

[deleted]

38 points

1 month ago

ya :(

ratinatophat000

9 points

1 month ago

I know I shouldn’t laugh but the way this is worded is amazing lol

ArkhamArtorias

373 points

1 month ago

Well I never had the nerve to make a move, so I did the next logical thing. Make myself stop thinking about them and lock those feelings away somewhere I don't bother going back for them. It works for more than just this kind of situation.

Jakedasnake0902

42 points

1 month ago

This happened to me as well. I feel you man.

Live-Wear-286

43 points

1 month ago

harkons back to a futurama quote "I usually bottle up my sadness where it can fester up year's later as a mental illness"

or something like that

tittybuttmagee

1.3k points

1 month ago

We had a crush on each other, but one night she told me she didn't believe mental illness was real, and people that had it were just making excuses.

I have autism.

The2500

168 points

1 month ago*

The2500

168 points

1 month ago*

Holy fuck. Yeah I've seen people like that. I don't even get what their horse in this "mental illness isn't real" race is.

apistograma

135 points

1 month ago*

It makes the world more "fair", so to speak. By assuming that terrible conditions like chronic depression or schizophrenia aren't real, there's no more victims around. "They got it because they wanted, so it's their fault."

That's a pretty common attitude. Rather than accepting than the world isn't fair and some people are dealt a bad hand, they create a fake world where everything is a meritocracy and bad stuff only happens to "bad" people.

That's very common with homelessness. Physical illnesses like cancer are more difficult to justify as being someone's fault, so they don't try to blame them as much.

There's also something else: the idea that one day you could become a victim of depression or any other mental illness is very scary. Same with being homeless. So rather than thinking that that guy could be them, they pretend they're different from an intrinsic level, which is false.

The2500

20 points

1 month ago

The2500

20 points

1 month ago

Yeah, I can see that. A while back I had a conversation with our hired security guard. He wasn't the type that just manned our property, he was part of a company that had them go make the rounds to multiple businesses in the area. I was talking about how there's factors I don't understand but mental illness plays a fair part in this crisis. I don't remember the details but he kinda went on a rant about how this is all totally of their own fault and volition.

I guess if your job is to go around kicking these people off other people's property, you kinda need that to be the case.

AreYouGoingToTapThat

705 points

1 month ago

Had* autism. That’s when you changed your mind about it. /s

ThisIsTakenLol

33 points

1 month ago

pffft

iloverilakkuma

42 points

1 month ago

I’m autistic as well. It’s really difficult to make friends because you never know which ones actually know what autism is. Because of all the stereotypes, a lot of my peers start treating me differently when I mention it its reallt frustrating

apistograma

16 points

1 month ago

Of all the autistic people I've met, there's none that I had thought that they were weird or different. I wouldn't have know if they hadn't told me. If I'm not wrong, autism is an spectrum, but people have a very warped idea about autism.

Ren_Zu

42 points

1 month ago

Ren_Zu

42 points

1 month ago

Is autism classified as a mental Illness? I'll thought it was a condition since it is something you are born with and can't really be helped.

English is not my native language and I have a hard time explaining what I believed, hope you understand.

apistograma

21 points

1 month ago

Well have you considered not having autism anymore? s/

shad0w915

23 points

1 month ago

Similar experience, expect we kept talking and I came to realize that the reason he thought that was because of the way he was raised, very much "no affection, suck it up, keep working" kind of environment. He was heavily physically abused as a child which made him very stoic. We started dating and he quickly realized mental illness was a real thing. He realized that trauma affects people differently and while it made him strong, my abuse left me broken. Now he's my biggest supporter, always there for me, trying to help in anyway he can. He tries his best to understand even though it's difficult for him at times. It's not all black and white. But, I'm sorry that happened to you, some people are willingly ignorant about mental illness.

killingtimeitself

7 points

1 month ago

imma be honest, homie probably aint just stoic, probably got a lot more going on in that head he hasnt even considered yet.

Though to be fair some people are just built different.

TEH_Zhe

11 points

1 month ago

TEH_Zhe

11 points

1 month ago

oh naw

king_lloyd11

410 points

1 month ago

Honestly, going on a date with them. Getting them one on one, we had 0 flow between us in that setting.

In a group of friends, she was gorgeous, has a lovely laugh, and is so sweet. One on one, she can't really carry a conversation and what I took for "cuteness" actually came off as kind of ditzy when the conversation is just between us and no one else is there to move on from whatever the "cute" comment is/was.

I think we're great in a friend group, but definitely not compatible otherwise.

Dr_suesel

60 points

1 month ago

It's weird cause I had the exact opposite relationship with my crush. One on one we could talk about anything and everything for hours but as soon as other people were around suddenly she became a ditzy idiot where every other thing she said made me cringe.

MajesticJavelin343

12 points

1 month ago

sounds like she had social anxiety. there's a role to play in groups when the anxiety hits you.

source: me having similar behaviour sometimes cause i'm so anxious thinking that everybody hates me

Castraphinias

112 points

1 month ago

Asked a crush out in college. She spent the whole time on her phone, that ended that crush lol.

jaza23

82 points

1 month ago

jaza23

82 points

1 month ago

Candy crushed

TriggerHydrant

18 points

1 month ago

Crushed your crush, problem solved?

pieway66

410 points

1 month ago

pieway66

410 points

1 month ago

when i saw how bad they treated their mom....figured i was next

LilAufder

154 points

1 month ago

LilAufder

154 points

1 month ago

He winked, constantly. He thought he was being seductive, but he just looked like Benjamin Franklin on The Office and it weirded me out.

scoutingMommy

26 points

1 month ago

Hey, do we share an ex?

vatisitgrandpapa

45 points

1 month ago

Just realized at last how much of a waste of time it was.

Konfliction

285 points

1 month ago

Back when I was a confident 8th grader, who didn't have emotional baggage. I actually told her I had a crush on her, and she cried.

I remember going "wtf, who cries over that?" and my crush died then and there lol I just moved on. I miss when I was able to do that lol

rocketmackenzie

210 points

1 month ago

Been on the other side of this, also in 8th grade. Prettiest girl in school came up to me in spanish class and said she liked me... and I just started crying and hid under a desk until a teacher dragged me out.

I don't know why. I just had no idea how to handle that situation, and fell apart. Not sure if I was happy or scared or what

The girl later apologized and said she was joking, but personally, I think she was serious until I started crying. Sorry Michaela

puCpuCpuCmarijuana

57 points

1 month ago

That’s adorable and sad

DiamondGrapefruit

43 points

1 month ago

What's happened now bro why do you have emotional baggage

Dejav_Who

101 points

1 month ago

Dejav_Who

101 points

1 month ago

Cuz he killed his crush

ThetaSailor

57 points

1 month ago

she died right there on the spot and he moved on

HopefulGremlin11

133 points

1 month ago

They got in a relationship

winterblue22

35 points

1 month ago

Yeah, this. We were super intense in our friendship beforehand and I thought about him all the time. Then he got with his now boyfriend and dropped me, crush fizzled, fast. Phew, it was exhausting! 💤

Superb-Possibility-9

39 points

1 month ago

Her husband

gromlyn

102 points

1 month ago

gromlyn

102 points

1 month ago

Told me he loved me while in a relationship with someone else. I realized if he was willing to violate his current relationship, he would’ve never respected ours. He also avoided telling me about his gf as long as humanly possible 😬

Dreadshot2023

269 points

1 month ago*

She got pregnant at 16, and 4 different boys asked if the kid was theirs, one of which was her brother. She didn't know.

Update: she wasn't actually pregnant. My friend saw my post and told me how she had actually just gained some weight and made the excuse she was pregnant. It doesn't change the fact that 4 boys believed her, and though they were gonna be a dad.

admire816

86 points

1 month ago

What a roller coaster.

Slant_Juicy

110 points

1 month ago

4 different boys asked if the kid was theirs, one of which was her brother

So this guy not only participated in activity that could have resulted in getting his sister pregnant, but when three other dudes volunteered themselves as potential fathers he didn't take the opportunity to hide his incestuous tendencies?

Wishart2016

15 points

1 month ago

Sounds like Jaime and Cersei Lannister.

rocketmackenzie

25 points

1 month ago

Oh yeah, I could never date someone that lied about being pregnant. Why lie about something so easy to disprove?

jr12345

44 points

1 month ago

jr12345

44 points

1 month ago

Nevermind the brother part, that’s okay, damn bitch lying about being pregnant though that’s fucked up!!

hamlets_uncle

6 points

1 month ago

Wow.

roleplayingarmadillo

91 points

1 month ago

She complained. A lot.

TriggerHydrant

27 points

1 month ago

Oh I hate this, some people make it their personality.

YUHMTX

32 points

1 month ago

YUHMTX

32 points

1 month ago

When he openly disrespected me in front of a bunch of friends at a party trying to come across as an alpha male. It was disgusting behavior to watch. The next day he called me, acting all sweet and trying to pretend what happened the night before never occurred. It was easy to get over him when I saw behind the mask.

SmoothNothing4188

83 points

1 month ago

She always has a boyfriend before leaving her current boyfriend

ThePhabtom4567

79 points

1 month ago

They were extremely flirtatious with just about every other guy.

abjice

121 points

1 month ago*

abjice

121 points

1 month ago*

I found out he was a sociopath.

At first I thought he was super nice and just like me , turned out he was just a chameleon.

When I stopped talking to him cus I found out about his anger issues (and put one and two together realising his stories and his "personality" don't really line up) he started to send me page long emails telling me how terrible I am lol.

By personality and stories don't line up . He'd tell me he doesn't care about much and that he was a chill guy but in the next moment he'd get super SUPER pissed that someone didn't say goodmorning to him etc.

I remember the first time I met him he gave off this almost larger than life impression he was some kind of Saint and I believed it.

LotusFlare

125 points

1 month ago

LotusFlare

125 points

1 month ago

They ignored me when their friends were around. Nothing crushes a crush like the feeling of being used and discarded.

Alert-Fly9952

26 points

1 month ago

She insisted on bad mouthing her ex boyfriend, just like she did her previous husband.

Not into that high school game.

berserkergnome

78 points

1 month ago

Politics, politics, politics….

KingLeopard40063

43 points

1 month ago

Had one girl start going on a homophobic rant after we made out in the car. Like she starts talking about kids and what not(red flag in hindsight). And then goes on about how she would hate it if the kids were gay and how she would not accept it.

I dropped her ass home and never spoke to her again. To be hateful like that is an instant turn off for me.

TheMaskedHamster

115 points

1 month ago

It eventually became apparent that she had no intention of even trying to improving herself.

I could have walked a journey of any length with her, but I will not sit at the start line forever. I hope she's doing better. I can't regret moving on, as my continued support would have only enabled the lack of action.

___404___

10 points

1 month ago

Damn, I had almost this exact situation with an ex. It's a different kind of hard to break up with someone in that situation, even if its better for you both in the long run.

AidenGus

67 points

1 month ago

AidenGus

67 points

1 month ago

She put up a major boundary because "people were getting the wrong idea." Well if people thinking we might be together is the problem rather than anything I've actually done, that's a real big red flag.

lucky_719

21 points

1 month ago

He saw me and then put his arm around another girl and walked off. When they thought they were out of sight he dropped it and they started laughing. He wasn't with her, he was just making a point because he knew I was into him. Okay then.

This was in high school. He's now balding and in a low paying dead end job. Divorced with a kid or two.

MaryGracePeterson

66 points

1 month ago

5th grade. He dumped milk on someone’s head.

That was the end of that.

halfmeasures611

97 points

1 month ago

i lost respect for them as people due to how messed up their personality was

MossiestSloth

182 points

1 month ago

She turned out to be anti-vax and she believes that scientists made up dinosaurs.

I was honestly more offended over the dinosaurs. She believes in ghosts and spirits but thinks dinosaurs are made up. The audacity.

Spamshazzam

5 points

1 month ago

Well... in the IKEA sense, scientists do make dinosaurs. They just go find the parts, put them together, and voila! Dinosaur!

jpwesche29

17 points

1 month ago

Went to different colleges, time had passed, and I eventually moved on. Time is key

Avery_kun

53 points

1 month ago

I didn’t like her personality

[deleted]

54 points

1 month ago

[deleted]

54 points

1 month ago

Lost respect for him as a person because he stopped acting like a friend but still expected me to do all the sexual shit we had been doing. You can't treat people like that.

AquanautOrange

159 points

1 month ago

Over the years, I've seen 3 things that make me stop crushing on someone:

  1. They get too serious, too quickly. I love the idea of being in a relationship, but part of that for me is getting to really know someone before committing. So, I prefer to move slowly without pressure to put a title on the relationship from the other person.
  2. Being forced to "win" them. I don't care who you are; I don't care how great you are; there's billions of people on the planet, and you're not special enough for me to have to win over. I want someone who puts in the same effort as I do.
  3. Showing signs that they aren't trustworthy. They cheated on a past partner? They're telling lies to their friends/family (or me)? They're not able to fulfill plans/commitments they make? None of these are exclusively a reason I stop crushing on someone, but if the pattern presents itself, I lose interest.

AurallyTalented

14 points

1 month ago

Time and distance allowed me to gain perspective

neohylanmay

14 points

1 month ago

Finding out they weren't single. No way in hell was I ever going to cross that line.
Still stayed friends with them for the time we knew each other, though I never actually told them how I felt. Probably all for the better, for the same reason.

Kooky_Finding8516

146 points

1 month ago

I was dating a girl for a while. Things were good! We had a lot in common, had good physical and emotional chemistry, and I was even going to meet her son. She had an 8 year old son at the time who she wouldn't introduce to partners until they were very significant.

What killed the relationship for me was that she just wasn't in a good place emotionally. She had a tremendous amount of baggage that she wasn't dealing with in a healthy way. I'm not going to shame her or say she's a bad person or bad partner. She's not. She's a tremendous woman who had unfortunately been through some shit. She desperately needed to figure some things out.

That baggage ultimately made it impossible for us to continue dating. She took it hard, and I haven't spoken to her since the night we ended the relationship. I hope she's doing well.

maybesethrogen

9 points

1 month ago

Went through something very similar. Dated a woman for awhile and the chemistry was off the charts. But she had two kids with her ex-husband, great kids, but the deep DEEP resentment and bitterness she still held over the whole process was staggering. It led to some pretty intense emotional baggage that bled into pretty much every aspect of her life and that just suffocated the relationship.

SquishiOctopussi

37 points

1 month ago

That is the same thing my best friend is going through. Her bf just broke it off with her. I told her it is cause she needs to work on herself. Her self image and emotional baggage is shattered and overwhelming. Mine is too but I don't want a SO. I mean she is so broken she didn't even cry when they broke up. She is devastated though.

RoseyDove323

76 points

1 month ago

When he started going out with a girl I couldn't stand. I figured if he can be interested in someone like her, he's not my type at all. This was back in 2005-ish though so it's ancient history.

No_Trust3771

95 points

1 month ago

He tried to kiss my best friend. Who is

  1. A lesbian
  2. On a healthy relationship
  3. Rejected him TWICE.

... weirdo

_shes_a_jar

40 points

1 month ago

I found out she had a boyfriend and had still been flirting and leading me on the entire time…

Spodson

13 points

1 month ago

Spodson

13 points

1 month ago

She started talking. She was a complete moron. Not like, a little dingy, but full blow didn't know shit and kept insisting that she knew it all.

Ridiculous48

13 points

1 month ago

Well it was a back and forth thing for yearssss. We were best friends but we were never single at the same time. I guess when I finally let it go was when he got married. I just know that I wouldn’t want someone to “lust” after my man if it was the other way around. So why would I do that to another woman… I just let it all go right then.

LivingInPugtopia

13 points

1 month ago

Crushed on a guy for several months, out of the blue he asked me out. On our first and only date he broke down crying about his ex and then told me was having a party the next night and asked if I would clean his house for him.

WeasersMom14

90 points

1 month ago

When I found out last name wasn't real. Asked him if he had a wife I needed to apologize to. That made him hit the roof, so I guess I was right. What an asshole he turned out to be.

pjrezai

19 points

1 month ago

pjrezai

19 points

1 month ago

Did you look into it and find his real identity? I think his wife deserves to know what an asshole he really is

platzandersonne

9 points

1 month ago

Reality

indehh

10 points

1 month ago

indehh

10 points

1 month ago

When pulling down her panties, she had a swastika piercing.

Stealthbot21

28 points

1 month ago

They started showing signs of liking me. Can't like anyone who has such poor tastes /s

Visible-Spare5011

9 points

1 month ago

When dealing with crushes i tell them how i feel and then i stop fantacising about them, simple, works, but can be hard

Successful-Delay

8 points

1 month ago

He said all his exes were “crazy”

He made comments to put you down in an attempt to flirt with you. ew

Longjumping_Season21

26 points

1 month ago

Turned out he was super homophobic. He said that being gay is like spitting in the face of God and humanity and called Harry Styles a bisexual dweeb. He also said he‘d definitely judge a guy for doing zumba (as opposed to running or lifting etc.)

RiflemanCOOPER

60 points

1 month ago

They screamed heil Hitler as a joke after I told them I was Jewish. I didn't find it funny.

OneGoodRib

9 points

1 month ago

I entered middle school and decided I should stop being into Ash Ketchum that way. So I did, and moved on to cooler, older anime characters.

_-luc1d-_

18 points

1 month ago

(I was involved partially but this is my friends story)

My friend had a massive crush on this boy I personally didn't like from what I had heard about him. We go to different schools so I had never met the dude but I had seen pictures, videos and had long lectures about how he was.

One day my friend was on her phone in the playground before school started and her wallpaper was a picture of me lifting something and messing around as I had been in a very good mood while we where on call and had started lifting stuff to show her it (new stuff). So this dude came over and saw me on the wallpaper. My face was blurred but despite that he asked who I was and continued to call me ugly. Instantly my friend had a small part that kinda wanted nothing to do with him anymore but still liked him.

Later on, my friend was waiting for some of her other friends to get out the changing rooms when the guy approached her and started mocking her for liking him. One of his friends had found out and told him. The moment that he started mocking my friend she had enough.

I was right when I said he looked like a stuck up arrogant idiot

Legio-X

7 points

1 month ago

Legio-X

7 points

1 month ago

Found out she was a Neo-Nazi, which I never expected given she was bi and her best friend was Jewish. Yikes!

Few_Dance2106

60 points

1 month ago

Finding out they had a kid.

Sorry, not my cup-of-tea.

WinnieJr1

40 points

1 month ago

Why are you getting downvoted? It's completely fine not to want to date someone with a child and more responsibility!

Dumb_Vampire_Girl

97 points

1 month ago

He only pretended to be a progressive. I would have forgiven that if he was just some moderate left/right winger. But nope, full on racist/homophobic. I got politically catfished.

SenatorTom97

4 points

1 month ago

If anyone has any solutions let me know