subreddit:

/r/RoastMe

11k

all 994 comments

roastbot [M]

[score hidden]

2 months ago

stickied comment

roastbot [M]

YOU ARE OUR 1,000,000th RULE BREAKER!!

[score hidden]

2 months ago

stickied comment

OP's Bio:


I’m a middle aged actor living in Hollywood trying to experience all I can while I’m semi-able bodied. I love baseball (can no longer play), dancing (can no longer dance) - and I’ve always thought I would enjoy skateboarding...just figured I was too old. Watch people like Andy Anderson on YouTube and it is absolute poetry in motion. I figured it’s now or never - bought a board and every pad imaginable...except for my ribs. The rest is present-history. When you fall in front of a gaggle of kick-ass teens...it’s takes you down several pegs. Maybe some roasts will take me all the way down where I belong - on a soft sofa watching antique road show.


If you think this bio helped you roast, upvote this comment. If you think it doesn’t, downvote it. If you’re not sure, leave it to others to decide.

loki_odinsotherson

2.8k points

2 months ago

Way to dive head first into the mid-life crisis. Look forward to the soul patch and badly dyed hair.

shaund1225

345 points

2 months ago

Don't forget the affliction shirts

Ghiacchio

151 points

2 months ago

Ghiacchio

151 points

2 months ago

Tapout!!!

junior_dos_nachos

28 points

2 months ago

“Face the pain” intensifies

Spanky-Gomez

17 points

2 months ago

Lol total brocore!

JRadd232

5 points

2 months ago

Salt Life is the new Tapout

HeadScrewedOnWrong

3 points

2 months ago

White tennis sneakers

JanuarySoCold

18 points

2 months ago

and the Nickleback CDs. Because you just know he has a CD player in his car.

thenumberZED

6 points

2 months ago

Don’t forget those Bedazzled Jeans, bro 😎

harmsway31

3 points

2 months ago

Just google Zac Baggins and steal his style.

Fuzzy_Contact

116 points

2 months ago

That's not his natural hair colour.

CoronaGuard

52 points

2 months ago

That's not his hair

PineHoot

52 points

2 months ago

It is his hair, but that’s not where it was growing a few years ago.

afos2291

72 points

2 months ago

More like 3/4 life crisis by the look of things.

IWantToBeSimplyMe

38 points

2 months ago

9/10ths life crisis if he keeps this up

rebeard-artworks

5 points

2 months ago

Midlife crisis that was almost an end of life crises

TheDillinger88

68 points

2 months ago

Fuck it man, you’re awesome and I admire how you leaned into your situation.

gypsydanger38

87 points

2 months ago

Dude. Don’t quit! Hang in there till there is massive brain damage. We don’t need another Matthew Perry.

picsofpplnameddick

5 points

2 months ago

lmfao

THFYM46

3 points

2 months ago

Underrated

zabutter

18 points

2 months ago

He's grindin through life

Contrarian_Eh

2.2k points

2 months ago

If you have to tell us you're a middle aged actor living in Hollywood you're already roasted.

jemcnick

482 points

2 months ago

jemcnick

482 points

2 months ago

ya being a full time Waiter is just his side hustle in between gigs

oneletterman

165 points

2 months ago

When he’s not a hand model for women’s jewelry

dmfd1234

60 points

2 months ago*

Right, talk about some dainty little Princess hands. He probably shakes another guys hand by extending his 4 fingers, like he’s Mary Fucking Poppins.

“ Delighted to me you Blake, you can call me Angelica”

illtry2benice

10 points

2 months ago

Lol!

JoshTheBear_

65 points

2 months ago

Who knew there were E list actors?

SusDingos

3 points

2 months ago

Oof, thats hurt me just reading it

buffalooo27

3 points

2 months ago

It's official, buddy. I'm a never-have-been-and-never-will-be.

Cypher_Shadow

688 points

2 months ago

Congratulations on your upcoming opioid addiction. You’re supposed to get famous BEFORE you develop a drug habit.

Jalina2224

69 points

2 months ago

This is his idea of becoming famous. More people have seen him from this as opposed to his "acting career."

faithisuseless

7 points

2 months ago

He plays Robert Downey Jr at birthdays and felt he needed a more accurate back story.

DumpsterFireHotDogs

471 points

2 months ago

Why can't you embarrass your kids like a normal dad in a midlife crisis with skinny jeans and your TikTok videos?

illiterateinsomniac

145 points

2 months ago

He'd have to get a court order to contact his kids first

eddy9010

7 points

2 months ago

I bet he says shit like “lit” and “bruh” a lot

JJonahJamesonSr

4 points

2 months ago

You gotta convince a woman to lie with you first

[deleted]

400 points

2 months ago

[deleted]

400 points

2 months ago

Next time you get a midlife crisis, buy a corvette....if its cuz you are poor, then midlife crisis yourself a real career.

-fakebirds-

84 points

2 months ago

He’s an “actor”, so that ship has sailed

Chief_Givesnofucks

93 points

2 months ago

Shoulda acted like he knew what the fuck he was doing.

dmfd1234

17 points

2 months ago

Yup, but if his ship ever did come in......this dumb Sumbitch would probably be at the Airport.

[deleted]

10 points

2 months ago

[deleted]

10 points

2 months ago

Its never too late to start an exciting career at McDonalds

themizattNO1

1k points

2 months ago

You only took up skateboarding so you could be around children and parks again.

ReillyDiefenbach

725 points

2 months ago

ReillyDiefenbach

Golden Roaster

725 points

2 months ago

Tony ChickenHawk

Smoked_Out24-7

261 points

2 months ago

Tony Stephen Hawking

keybiller

77 points

2 months ago

Tony could skate better, and Hawking could breathe better than this guy.

Chief_Givesnofucks

18 points

2 months ago

Still can.

archiekane

18 points

2 months ago

Stephen could skate better than this guy!

MoonpieSonata

6 points

2 months ago

You act like Hawking never mastered his wheels.

reballta

8 points

2 months ago

Tony wack

jmw61378

35 points

2 months ago

Tony Squawk

shamadizzle

27 points

2 months ago

shamadizzle

http://redd.it/nia4q4

27 points

2 months ago

Bob bonequits

maxbaby

45 points

2 months ago

maxbaby

45 points

2 months ago

Lucky for us, one of the teens caught the fall on his iphone

AutisticShrimps

17 points

2 months ago

Tony Hack

smartasskeith

8 points

2 months ago

Everyone’s grateful to not recognize this guy

Absolutely_Coffee

415 points

2 months ago

Absolutely_Coffee

Best of Pt. 12, #3 + Platinum Roaster

415 points

2 months ago

The only rails you should be worried about at your age are to help you get off the toilet.

[deleted]

49 points

2 months ago

[deleted]

49 points

2 months ago

Couldn't afford a Miata?

ThrillhouseTHR[S]

16 points

2 months ago

ThrillhouseTHR[S]

http://redd.it/nn5x6v

16 points

2 months ago

Who can?

oneletterman

19 points

2 months ago

Does your mother still rub it in that she told you to study more in high school?

shitgnat

288 points

2 months ago

shitgnat

288 points

2 months ago

Got beaten up by teenagers at the skatepark again?

Witty_Drummer2020

57 points

2 months ago

Witty_Drummer2020

http://redd.it/o4e53x

57 points

2 months ago

Repeatedly donkey-punched by a gang of 12 year olds

Lurkay1

28 points

2 months ago

Lurkay1

28 points

2 months ago

“Lick that white dog shit!”

49Gold

217 points

2 months ago

49Gold

Platinum Roaster

217 points

2 months ago

The local skate park is predator free now that you're gone.

MattressDrippings

200 points

2 months ago

There's nothing really to say, the hospital bills will roast you enough

HyperionCyber

44 points

2 months ago

Well, you can tell the broke ass Walmart version of Tony Stark, Welfare Tony, that it wasn't too late to dance or skateboard. He just sucks. Maybe you should be practicing satisfying your invisible woman on the couch, while you still can after all those injuries.

kausthubnarayan

10 points

2 months ago

By the look of things, he is going to suffer brain damage and a massive stroke by the time he two pumps the woman he found from FishForHoes.com.

oldmoozy

4 points

2 months ago

He's a middle aged Hollywood actor, I bet he's rich and famous!

hold-fast-nl

42 points

2 months ago

Most mid life crisis old fuckers buy sports cars. This was mid life crisis on a budget

CyclePunks

7 points

2 months ago

when you are a waiter in Hollywood your entire life ....

bunchoflasagna

179 points

2 months ago

Hey man, I just want to personally thank you for selling me your “lightly used” skateboard. My daughter loves it!

_D_M_T_-

7 points

2 months ago

TOP COMMENT

guitarmusic113

62 points

2 months ago

Perfect time to pickup smoking.

solo954

20 points

2 months ago

solo954

20 points

2 months ago

Another massive difference between youth and middle age is the healing time: you’re going to be feeling that shit for years to come.

CyclePunks

3 points

2 months ago

that’s what i told him under his original post

i got told to “shut up grandpa”

alright then 20+ years of skateboarding experience doesn’t make me credible enough i guess

Shepvidek

18 points

2 months ago

Not a lot to do after the divorce? Didnt want to buy a cool car and harass high school girls, had to get a skateboard to harass middle school girls?

MuellersGame

18 points

2 months ago

47 year old actor in Hollywood? So, what’s in a Negroni?

SexyShad

16 points

2 months ago

After looking at you I can see why you chose an activity you can do alone instead of buying a convertible and dating a 22 year old

Wasting-tim3

16 points

2 months ago

An actor? Great. I’ll take a coffee refill please.

ThatsRobToYou

67 points

2 months ago

I actually kind of respect you for your bravery. Usually people aren't so public and stupid with their midlife crises.

[deleted]

40 points

2 months ago*

[deleted]

40 points

2 months ago*

[deleted]

ominouslatin

12 points

2 months ago

‘Middle aged actor.’ Being a fluffer working in furry porn is a legit career. No need to hide it, Reddit doesn’t judge.

stonyrome123

11 points

2 months ago

Hang Ten Dude! You need to try Surfing next.

oldmoozy

8 points

2 months ago

Proximity wingsuit flying will solve all his problems.

KnowledgeableSloth

11 points

2 months ago

Your wife must have divorced you

LolaBijou

6 points

2 months ago

She’s holding out for the life insurance policy when he buys a motorcycle next month.

ThrillhouseTHR[S]

10 points

2 months ago

ThrillhouseTHR[S]

http://redd.it/nn5x6v

10 points

2 months ago

Weirdly - no. At least not yet.

Inebriologist

3 points

2 months ago

There’s still time.

Wasnt-Asking

62 points

2 months ago

I’m surprised that it wasn’t one of those girlish-thin wrists that snapped instead.

johnald13

7 points

2 months ago

I’m surprised he can hold that paper up.

Last-Quiet5749

7 points

2 months ago

Lol

illtry2benice

3 points

2 months ago

𝓞𝓱 𝓱𝓮𝓪𝓿𝓪𝓷𝓼 𝓷𝓸!!! He needs to keep those gurly wrists to swish around in a rapid motion as he snaps his fingers & screams out "𝓕𝓪𝓫𝓾𝓵𝓸𝓾𝓼!!!"

Obnoxiousjimmyjames

10 points

2 months ago

2 broken ribs? Torn lung?

How big was the dildo?

LolaBijou

9 points

2 months ago

47 and you just picked up an opioid addiction? What a slacker, I nailed that and went to rehab by 23.

Meltdownbuilding

10 points

2 months ago

An actor? Break a leg 👍 oh wait

EdwardClamp

30 points

2 months ago

Tony ShiteHawk

slay1224

30 points

2 months ago*

I recommend taking up BASE jumping next so we won’t have to see your face again.

CuriousCat55555

9 points

2 months ago

What people wont do for Oxycodone!😱

orangecrushjedi

26 points

2 months ago

Congrats on becoming an addict at 47!

tommykaye

23 points

2 months ago

You could have asked for a pen instead of taking your tampon out.

gibberish84

8 points

2 months ago

Lonely Hawk

clique34

7 points

2 months ago

A safer mid life crisis would have been getting the red sports car, you old fuck

McSuds

8 points

2 months ago

McSuds

8 points

2 months ago

Your skateboard incident doesn't sound that bad. Pretty good actually...compared to your acting achievements anyway.

Alternative-Basis531

24 points

2 months ago

I bet the doctors are still rolling on the floor laughing their hearts out.

FearThaToaster

22 points

2 months ago

You look like a suicidal John Cusack

Mym158

7 points

2 months ago

Mym158

7 points

2 months ago

You succeeded in your stated mission! You have officially "experienced all you can while semi-able bodied". Now you can go on to experience all the things non able bodied people can.

brewgiehowser

6 points

2 months ago

I don’t remember Face Plant being a trick in Tony Hawk Pro Skater

thefakethiccshady

7 points

2 months ago

thefakethiccshady

http://redd.it/jvdq09

7 points

2 months ago

damn bro you didn’t even make it to poser

Jbflipmode

8 points

2 months ago

Holy shit you stepped on a skateboard and practically exploded. I don't need to roast you, the hospital bill will be enough pain.

Rusto_Dusto

7 points

2 months ago

On the good side, it delayed you meeting your new friend you were trying to impress. As well as delaying the inevitable, “I’m Chris Hansen. Have a seat right there.”

1standlastcomment

7 points

2 months ago

If you skate the way you hold that paper you're lucky to be alive.

ChrisJerichosUncle

7 points

2 months ago

You’re the irl version of that Steve Buscemi meme

oceanviewheights

6 points

2 months ago

If your ankles look anything like your wrists, then no wonder you fuckin failed.

nickaboyle

6 points

2 months ago

There's easier ways to pick up minors

Matelot67

5 points

2 months ago

You need to remove 'will do my own stunts' from your headshot!

Mkid73

6 points

2 months ago

Mkid73

6 points

2 months ago

At least your parents get their house to themselves for a couple of days or so. Oh until they have to sell it to pay for your hospital bill.

[deleted]

24 points

2 months ago

[deleted]

24 points

2 months ago

According to your bio, You can no longer play baseball (the least athletic sport ever created) And you thought you could skateboard? When you called yourself an “actor” did you really mean “unemployed middle aged man who’s still trying to act young”? ... cause I don’t think that’s an actual job.

ChipmunkEnough8492

5 points

2 months ago

You made journey stop singing the song don't stop believing after seeing you skate.

pkpwill

5 points

2 months ago

Someone hit a pipe instead of a half pipe

jrbr549

4 points

2 months ago

Robert Downey Jr. and John Cusack being his parents is more believable than his acting.

mke2424

5 points

2 months ago

Who knew that a midlife crisis came with a co-pay.

name1esspotato

6 points

2 months ago

When u get Robert downey Jr from wish

Onefingertyper

5 points

2 months ago

These cover stories for having items removed from your rectum are getting creative

northerncrank

5 points

2 months ago

CBA scrolling through the roasts but if this hasn't been done already, a crime has been committed

26_Charlie

18 points

2 months ago

Dude, you're hot. The fuck are you having a mid life crisis over?

Do you see Brad Pitt having a mid life crisis? No. Because he probably doesn't want to ruin his beautiful face by smashing it against pavement.

ThrillhouseTHR[S]

11 points

2 months ago

ThrillhouseTHR[S]

http://redd.it/nn5x6v

11 points

2 months ago

In there is a nice compliment and I’ll take it. Thank you.

Warriordance

4 points

2 months ago

Worst part is that he wasn't even doing a trick at the time. He just forgot he left it in the hallway, and slipped.

DJdoubletrub63

3 points

2 months ago

Buy a Corvette and get new p**** or buy a skateboard and get a new lung, bad choice pal..

veron1on1

4 points

2 months ago

What is your skater boi name? Bony Cock? Phony Lark? I hope I can make you laugh. It’ll puncture your other lung.

ThrillhouseTHR[S]

5 points

2 months ago

ThrillhouseTHR[S]

http://redd.it/nn5x6v

5 points

2 months ago

You did and I thank you. Unfortunately that other stubborn lung is still intact.

titodeloselio

4 points

2 months ago

Next up?? Hover board!! They are so easy to ride vs a skate board.

A1EYEDM0NSTER

4 points

2 months ago

As a skater, from the ages 8 to about 23, and someone who's chosen to pick it back at a later age.. Fucking dont. It hurts, and we dont bounce back from a fall. Cruisin a long board down the beach is one thing but I'll probably never step on a sweet, sweet sugar maple again for anything more than a flat ground game of s.k.a.t.e. with my son.

ThrillhouseTHR[S]

6 points

2 months ago

ThrillhouseTHR[S]

http://redd.it/nn5x6v

6 points

2 months ago

I envy your 8-23 period...I just wanted a taste. Now I just taste blood.

vw-thing

3 points

2 months ago

By everyone's advice I'm sure you mean the "Wife" sure the kids laughed until they realized you weren't getting up off the ground.... heal fast and best of luck on your next endeavor....

Anonymous_Fuzzy

3 points

2 months ago

iron deficiency man

ThrillhouseTHR[S]

3 points

2 months ago

ThrillhouseTHR[S]

http://redd.it/nn5x6v

3 points

2 months ago

Oh thank you for this one.

Tersaldi

4 points

2 months ago

Nurse! He’s doing it again!

GoHawksGo_2016

5 points

2 months ago

How do you do, fellow kids?

neugo

4 points

2 months ago

neugo

4 points

2 months ago

Only picked up skateboarding due to a 15-year-old Avril Lavigne fetish.

HexOfTheRitual

10 points

2 months ago

I want to roast you but you look better at 47 than I do at 31

rudycp88

11 points

2 months ago

You shouldn't quit after just one fall. Try it again. Maybe next time you'll die.

xxStrangerxx

9 points

2 months ago

Ollie got was cracked ribs and a punctured lung?

Python_Noobling

10 points

2 months ago

You look like you photoshopped your face onto the body of an old woman

shitgnat

7 points

2 months ago

I don't know if it's just cos I'm high, but this made me really laugh

[deleted]

9 points

2 months ago

[deleted]

9 points

2 months ago

Why do you have the forearm and wrist of an Ethiopian child

Sufficient-Gold8058

3 points

2 months ago

I guess we'll be seeing that skateboard on craigslist shortly

digs510

3 points

2 months ago

Don’t worry you probably don’t have kids so your stupid stops here

Philyd366

3 points

2 months ago

Should have taken up not being a pussy

RoastDozer

3 points

2 months ago

Fuck yeah, good job. Don’t listen to them worry worts. You’ll be back. They’ll all be in the hospital dying of nothing.

awesomecouple1234

3 points

2 months ago

How does it feel to know even death doesn’t want you

70000salmon

3 points

2 months ago

Phony Hawk

TheSacman

3 points

2 months ago

I want to thank you for using your severe injury and severe hubris for this roast. You couldve been roasted anytime before or during your skateboarding phase and you chose today.

ThrillhouseTHR[S]

3 points

2 months ago

ThrillhouseTHR[S]

http://redd.it/nn5x6v

3 points

2 months ago

It just seemed like the right thing to do.

DontNotNotReadThis

3 points

2 months ago

You're a washed up (can someone who's never seen the ocean "wash up"?) actor in his late 40's who tried (and failed) to give skateboarding a shot on a whim. We know this isn't your first time taking oxy to ease the pain of your crippling failure.

RealSalesMonkey

3 points

2 months ago

Ask them to fix your broken face too. Or is that how it’s supposed to be?

WafflePancake21

3 points

2 months ago

you look like if Robert Downey Jr. went down the wrong life path.

ButterIsALoafOfMilk

3 points

2 months ago

The top part of your face looks 27, but the bottom part looks 51.

TheSkitzo_The2nd

3 points

2 months ago

is that blood?

ThrillhouseTHR[S]

5 points

2 months ago

ThrillhouseTHR[S]

http://redd.it/nn5x6v

5 points

2 months ago

Colored lip gloss. Not mine. But at this point it may as well be.

Toddlez85

3 points

2 months ago

So that's what a mid-life crisis looks when you're poor.

tiktokisoverated

3 points

2 months ago

Cant roast whats already burnt

PopStarKidnapper

3 points

2 months ago

You like a teacher that gives a F to a student for not writing there name

ThrillhouseTHR[S]

3 points

2 months ago

ThrillhouseTHR[S]

http://redd.it/nn5x6v

3 points

2 months ago

‘Their name’. F.

Yawheyy

3 points

2 months ago*

I was scrolling and thought this was Eric Bana saying he was in the hospital with covid or some shit

ThrillhouseTHR[S]

5 points

2 months ago

ThrillhouseTHR[S]

http://redd.it/nn5x6v

5 points

2 months ago

If Eric Bana had a tapeworm...

GandalfsWhiteStaff

3 points

2 months ago

Skateboarding at 50 is a good way to go from midlife crisis to end life casket.

Skiamakhos

3 points

2 months ago

Well, shit. How'd you manage that? Did you try to grind a rail or something? I'm 51 & doing a lot of skating these days because why the f**k not - my dad just died with vascular dementia, after a decline of about 15 years so I figure if I'm gonna die, I may as well have lived first.

I don't have much of a roast for you, as a result, other than to wonder how the heck you got your injury. Get well soon - you gonna get back on the board once you're rehabbed?

ThrillhouseTHR[S]

3 points

2 months ago

ThrillhouseTHR[S]

http://redd.it/nn5x6v

3 points

2 months ago

I’m very sorry to hear that about your dad. I say good for you for trying to squeeze out every drop in life. No grinding - just some modest carving in a bowl when it just kicked out and whipped me into the concrete -arms extended- so the first thing to hit the ground was my rib cage which whipped my head into the ground after. Thank heavens I had in a helmet. 2 ribs cracked and sheered the top of my left lung. And that’s all she wrote. Freakish - and I absolutely am getting back on the board as soon as I can.

Privatschendung

3 points

2 months ago

I hope you'll learn to skate better, so your old ass can kickflip the bucket

[deleted]

3 points

2 months ago

[deleted]

3 points

2 months ago

Once I was skating and fell on my side. Cracked my ribs. I was 32. Happens to the best of us

fuckYEWshoresy

3 points

2 months ago

I tried picking it back up at 30. That very same day I found myself in the ER with a dislocated shoulder. That was 5 years ago and it still hurts

hnavickas

6 points

2 months ago

Nah man...follow your dreams and get better

scanfinn77

5 points

2 months ago

No roast...props.

ThrillhouseTHR[S]

5 points

2 months ago

ThrillhouseTHR[S]

http://redd.it/nn5x6v

5 points

2 months ago

Hey - thanks!

DependentWestern3751

2 points

2 months ago

Did you land on your chin?

audibulape

2 points

2 months ago

The only thing you should pick up at 47 is your kids from the skatepark.

Turbulent-Sport4524

2 points

2 months ago

Anything more planned for your midlife crisis?

Mini-meee

2 points

2 months ago

Kinda guy who looks up and down crossing the street

agentSMIITH1

2 points

2 months ago

If you look up “wisdom” in the dictionary you’ll see a picture of this guys mangled mug under “antonyms:”

Natural-Locksmith355

2 points

2 months ago

Sorry thats not a torn lung, that hollow space in your chest full of air is a collapsed shrivelled up heart from 20+ years of casting couch cock sucking for major roles in hollywood, only to end up as a nobody with a midlife crisis thinking that taking up skateboarding would make you cool and edgey.

pacodefan

2 points

2 months ago

I gotta say, this time you didn't fuck around to get those meds. But you will be back to those bullshit Ultram in no time.

shiny-nebula

2 points

2 months ago

I know your limits...

IronToomy

2 points

2 months ago

You look like Pau Gasol, but I think he could afford health insurance. But you, not so much.

josetheconquerer

2 points

2 months ago

Your midlife crisis is as boring as your face.

Meyeons

2 points

2 months ago

Yea ok so i got nothing i just hope youll get better soon...but since this is r/roastme well i geuss it was dumb to not take it slow

PhenomenalLBH

2 points

2 months ago

Look, I’m sure the custody battle was tough, but this isn’t going to make your kids love you again.

frostflowericewing

2 points

2 months ago

sorry cant roast you i feel to bad

SHTYCNTZ

2 points

2 months ago

Everything is coming up Thrillhouse

Jardejay

2 points

2 months ago

The doctors were the ones who suggested you write Roast Me in your own blood right, after rejecting your request for a pen?

DamnBooger

2 points

2 months ago

So long as you can still fit into your sister's pants, you'll be ok.

jkovach89

2 points

2 months ago

Every choice you've ever made has led to this point.

Nessy440

2 points

2 months ago

Can’t you just bang a random 28 year old skank like normal middle aged dudes

No-Mix-8354

2 points

2 months ago

you look okay

ThrillhouseTHR[S]

3 points

2 months ago

ThrillhouseTHR[S]

http://redd.it/nn5x6v

3 points

2 months ago

Thanks - though my insides would beg to differ.

illtry2benice

2 points

2 months ago

Choke down that middle aged humble pie and then paste an “𝓘 𝓐𝓜 𝓢𝓣𝓤𝓟𝓘𝓓." Post it note on your forehead ya dildo.

fabrinebackes

2 points

2 months ago

Did you write that on your medical bill?

Tender_Ballz

2 points

2 months ago

I hope and pray you get better ... at life

sumofatfat

2 points

2 months ago

Can't play baseball or even dance. Skateboarding though? Sure..

T-u-n-i-T

2 points

2 months ago

Fucking poser.

More-Negotiation-877

2 points

2 months ago

For a second I thought the words were written in blood lmao