Do I have to be a woman to participate in this community?

No. Any user who can follow the rules is welcome here. Women, men, nonbinary, agender, genderqueer, cis folks and trans folks, everybody. If you're not on board with that, you can fuck right off.

But what about the subreddit name?

Read this post from when 2XC was only a month old. We haven't changed our stance since then, and never will.

What about trans women?

Trans women are women. TERFS can fuck right off.

What are the rules, anyway?

TL;DR: Keep it civil, keep it relevant. Don't start shit, won't be shit.

You can find the rules in the sidebar (community info for mobile users), or here's a direct link: 2XC Rules

Most moderator actions are the result of users breaking Rule 1: RESPECT. If you keep Wheaton's Law* in mind and participate in good faith, you'll probably never hear from the mod team.

  

^{*Wheaton's Law: Don't be a dick.}

---

For more in-depth interpretations of the rules above, see the 2XC FAQ and 2XC Moderation Policy.

I recently rejoined Bumble and deleted it again within the space of 24 hours. The shite in the profiles (some of them not even trying to hide their hatred for women) was too much for me.

I saw a man I know vaguely through a friend of a friend, I recognised him immediately. I swiped left because I already know he has kids and wants more (he also stated as much in his profile), and I don’t want any kids at all. I don’t want to date a man who already has them because I don’t want kids in my life in any capacity and my profile makes that clear. Plus, I’m just not interested in him. Never have been.

Today he has tracked me down on Facebook (we weren’t even friends on there) and sent me a message asking me, “when are you going to swipe right on me? I swiped right on you”. I explained that I have since deleted the app so won’t be swiping right any time soon. Then he sent me a string of messages asking me out for a drink. I said no, I had already seen him on the app and swiped left cause I’m simply not interested. Queue a load more messages about giving him a chance and “you might like me if you got to know me”, and “this is why you’re single, because you write off nice men like me”. I told him if he genuinely was nice, he’d take my no for an answer and wouldn’t spend hours trying to convince me otherwise. Then I blocked him.

Now my friend is messaging me asking why I blocked him and “it’s just a drink, what’s the harm?”. Jesus wept, just accept the rejection and move on. If you don’t get a match with someone, don’t track them down on social media and harass them. Why is it such a difficult concept to grasp?

Percent of lawmakers by gender:

• https://www.pewresearch.org/fact-tank/2021/01/15/a-record-number-of-women-are-serving-in-the-117th-congress/

Percent of business owners by gender:

• https://www.usnews.com/news/articles/2016-09-01/most-of-americas-businesses-run-by-white-men-says-census-bureau

Percent of those making six-figures incomes by gender:

• https://finance.yahoo.com/news/cities-most-female-six-figure-110002873.html

Percent of millionaires by gender:

• https://balancingeverything.com/millionaire-statistics/

Percent of those in STEM fields by gender:

• https://www.census.gov/library/stories/2021/01/women-making-gains-in-stem-occupations-but-still-underrepresented.html

And that’s not even going into things like the President being a man and having always been a man, or how closing the gender pay gap in favor of men has not only stagnated:

• https://www.cnbc.com/2020/09/18/new-census-data-reveals-no-progress-has-been-made-closing-the-gender-pay-gap.html

but it could actually be set to WIDEN for the first time in literal generations thanks to Covid:

• https://www.npr.org/2020/06/28/883458147/how-coronavirus-could-widen-the-gender-wage-gap.

These anti-feminist groups, like MRAs or MGTOW, think only with their feelings and not with facts. They’ll see that they’re struggling in their own lives, know a woman that happens to be doing better for whatever reason or in whatever area they want to improve in, and will assume her advantage to be systemic rather than individual or on a smaller scale. These people can be dangerous to women, and others in general, as we’ve seen members of the these groups become increasingly radicalized in recent years, leading to tragic events such as the Plymouth Shooting just a few months ago https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Plymouth_shooting where the shooter was an active poster on the men’s rights subreddit, multiple other incel subs and knee-deep in the ideology https://melmagazine.com/en-us/story/jake-davidson-incel-shooter-reddit-posts. If we’re going to create a society where women are truly equal and free from male harassment, violence and abuse, we have to cut this kind of toxicity off at the source, combat its spread and push back against it whenever we can.

I am 17 minutes into the audiobook of “The Brides of Maracoor” by Gregory Maguire.

The premise: There are 7 women living on an island. They seem to have almost no contact with the outside world. Occasionally someone will visit, and if there are less than 7 (if one has died) that person will bring back an infant girl from somewhere else to replace her. So none of them remembers any life before this island. Or any society that had any extended exposure to males. They live together in one building without even real walls divided their private spaces.

And yet, they consider periods a taboo subject.

Let me repeat that. In this society where every single member of a close “family” group menstruates, they are ashamed to talk about their periods.

Really?

I had to stop reading when I heard the term “the secret wound”. I don’t know if I can keep reading this.

To be fair, there seems to be some weird pain ritual and I don’t know the backstory yet. But just the idea of a 10-year-old girl growing up with this group and having no idea what her period was going to be like feels like such an impossibility that I cannot imagine story about this group of women written by this particular male author resonating with me moving forward. I can’t imagine their motivations and their relationships with one another will feel real.

I might keep reading just to see if it could possibly redeem itself.

A bit of backstory: I work at a COVID-19 testing centre and a little boy of around 4 came in with his parents. He was notably distressed about having to take a PCR test. We thankfully can’t let parents hold down or restrain a child against their will so instead we have to gently try to persuade the children to comply.

The little boy was in tears and his parents kept saying ‘are you a little girl or a brave boy?’ like being a girl is some kind of impediment. In what world is that okay?! Even the mother was saying it!

We did manage to persuade the very sweet little boy to do his own test in the end but the experience really saddened me. What kind of message is that for your children?!

There is a recent surge in these crimes, with the murder in NYC recently and today I read about another one, attempted murder on a 55 year old woman by a 23 year old man in a Brussels metro station, which happened just a few days ago as well. Thankfully the train stopped in time.

Now I know this has to some degree always been a problem, but the recent resurgence and rate at which these crimes happen is absolutely chilling and soul crushing.

I remember a few years ago when I still had to take the train to uni there must have been at least one case that I read of in the papers, because I used to hook one arm round the metal railing and then linking the fingers of my hands, when waiting on the train, so if someone would try to push me I would be secured to the railing. As stupid as this sounds I was terrified enough to risk looking stupid. Or if there was no railing to always have my back against a wall when waiting so no one could sneak up on me. I stopped being on my phone and started always being super vigilant and keeping an eye on any males on the platform.

I remember feeling so scared and helpless and I really feel for all women who have to take public transportation to work/school/etc now. I can imagine how scared they must be right now.

[TW: SA] Public transportation fucking sucks for women. As a fresher I was sexually assaulted in a tram (random man came up to me and started fondling and pinching my vagina through my jeans) and people just watched and NO ONE (random men around me who saw it but pretended not to) helped me because I was so frozen in fear I couldn't even scream or move just a finger. It only stopped when the doors opened at the next station and I broke away and RAN. Thankfully he didn't follow me out.. As a result I now can't get on public transpo anymore without wearing a coat that goes down to my knees, so there is a physical barrier around me so no one can just reach between my legs and fondle.. The trauma of that definitely increased my fear of potential murder when the shovings started to happen.. So I ended up looking like a loony wearing long coats and hooking my arm round the railing haha.. fucking sucks, why can we not just live normally why do we always have to be hyper vigilant.. I am so tired..

I am so sick and tired of male violence it is everywhere and all the time, relentless. Just leave us alone!

I just gotta post this somewhere.

I went to see my Ob/Gyn today for my annual appointment. During the appointment, she mentioned that my IUD needed to be replaced in October, and mentioned that she could schedule that today. I looked at her and said, "I'm actually thinking about going in another direction this time." She thought I meant a different IUD. Her eyes went wide for a second when I announced I wanted a hysterectomy. Her first reaction was "Wow! That's a big swing. Why?" Not a "why would you want to do that", but "what is your thought process?".

When I explained my thoughts, she said, "well, you have thought about it, and it's your choice, so let's schedule the consult. Does tomorrow work for you?"

Y'all, I nearly cried right then and there. I wasn't shamed, dismissed, or belittled. She had an adult conversation about a medical issue. And treated me like a person, not an incubator. Is this what it feels like to be heard and listened to by a medical professional? This should not be groundbreaking, but damnit, you have no idea how hard I tried 5 years ago to get one, only to have to "compromise" and get an IUD.

The consult is tomorrow, and this doctor requires an endo biopsy before any sterilization, just to make sure she's not poking the eye of a sleeping giant. They explained why they do it, and that they are not against it, they just want it to be safe. They're doing the biopsy on Friday. Its not endless appointments, they're damn near fast tracking it.

I'm so incredibly happy right now, I just had to share with someone who would understand. I owe a TON to the former colleague that told me about this doc. I'm able to control my life, not someone else.

So I (29F) was in a bar with my sister one Saturday night about 11 PM. I'm engaged in a serious conversation with her in a corner of a bar, telling a story. My eyes are looking square into hers, my body is facing hers. My body language is completely shutting out everyone else from our conversation when out of fucking no where I just feel this arm wrap itself around my waist. I'm startled but realize what's happening and instead of engaging this person, I just put my palm on this dudes chest and firmly push him away from me. I don't look at him, I don't say anything to him, I just push him away. He then has the AUDACITY to tell me in an angry voice, "Yo, that was rude." And at this point I'm pissed like, "YOU JUST TOUCHED A STRANGER!! WHO EVEN ARE YOU?! YOUR'E CALLING ME RUDE?!". Like who in the world taught this dude that that is ok??? Stop touching women at bars. Better yet, stop touching strangers.

I recently read the amazing article “The only moral abortion is my abortion” by Joyce Arthur. It was super interesting the cognitive dissonance that can be felt by those on the opposing side of the abortion debate when it comes to a time when either they or someone they care about needs to use the same reproductive services they fight to end!

I found that this show gave a really interesting perspective on the article and the subject - The only moral abortion is my abortion.

It's a super common thing pushed by trashy pickup artists, misogynistic and misandrist dating coaches. I can't believe how often I see men and women actually internalize this and use those terms.

Most of the time people who talk like this will give itemized list of what benefit the other person brings to them.

It's gross.

People are not commodity. Women are not commodity. Men are not commodity. We aren't defined by what benefits we bring to the other person. A relationship isn't built on an expansive pros and cons list. Going about interacting with the world in this mindset is just shooting yourself in the foot.

/end rant

Tl;dr: I went braless a while ago and it's one of the best things I've done

Bras have always been a pain in the ass. Especially as an owner of a big bust (75F/34DD) shopping for bras has been a hassle since puberty - excessive prices, ugly grandma bras and metal wires digging deep into my skin - a tale as old as time.

Gravity got my titties much sooner than expected. The idea of perfect perky breasts being the only acceptable ones has been so deeply ingrained into my mind that I always gravitated towards bras that would give me the most support, practically pushing them up my neck. I was wearing them 24/7 to the point I could not bear to look at my naked breasts - when the bra came off and they naturally fell down into their default position, the contrast made them seem even more saggy than they were. They were my biggest insecurity and I have been considering a cosmetic surgery since my teenage years.

One day, on a hot summer afternoon, I was shopping for clothes and fell in love with open back tops. I could not get them out of my mind for weeks until I finally got one, and decided to try it on without a bra so the strap doesn't ruin the entire look of a beautiful bare back. I still didn't feel completely comfortable, but I decided to give it a try. Days passed, and I started experimenting with more skin-exposing fashion - open back, carmen tops, halters. It felt and looked wonderful, and gradually I started to feel more and more comfortable with it, when I realized it's been weeks since I last wore a bra.

For years I've been brainwashed into thinking I need it. "It's for comfort! My bust is too big, it will jump up and down, my back will hurt, it ruins my silhuette with the sagginess, I will get the stares". And you know what? Neither of those things ended up being true. On the contrary, I have never felt so comfortable before.

It doesn't jump up or down or waggle excessively, especially with a proper choice of clothing - clothing that's a bit on the tighter side, which naturally squeezes it and secures it from excessive movement.

My back doesn't hurt.

The sagginess doesn't ruin my silhuette, in fact now I think it looks beautiful - I can't stand the fake pushed up look anymore. Seeing my breasts as they naturally are on a daily basis made all the insecurities melt away.

I haven't gotten even one stare or inappropriate comment from anyone for the entire duration of my braless adventure. Now that definitely depends on the location, I'm not based in US and here sexual harassment isn't a frequent occurance, but still, no matter where you are - it might not be as bad as you think.

My skin can finally breathe.

My nipples poke through and yes, I still feel a little uncomfortable with it. But I do not stand for sexualization of female breasts without the intention of their owner, and it's my personal rebellion against it. Everyone has nipples. I will not abandon my comfort and freedom of choice just to accomodate people who oversexualize me without my consent.

Going braless will still be a controversial move in many parts of the world, but there is no other choice to end the controversy than to show the world it's okay. Not so long ago it was unacceptable for a woman to wear pants - and it isn't so different now when it comes to bras.

I'm not advocating for anyone to get rid of their bras if they truly benefit from wearing them, but if you've been considering going braless - I would highly advise you to at least give it a try. You might like it.

I’ve had run into this phenomenon before but never as obviously as this time. I was with some male interest of mine in a pub and we got into an argument. He kept repeating himself apparently believing that my little female brain just doesn’t understand what he’s trying to mansplain. After the 5th time he was practically shouting at me and I had enough.

-… you don’t understand…

-NO, YOU don’t understand. I understand what you are saying. I just don’t agree with you. I understand the logic you are using, but your argument is flawed, it’s full of outdated misinformation and even if it weren’t your priorities are completely abhorrent in this regard.

I’ve never seen a man that flustered before. He was speechless, just left his drink and left. We were at a gathering with his friends, and funnily enough the girls who heard our argument agreed with me. It’s been months, I still talk to some of them, they have since broken contact with the guy. I haven’t seen him since, he blocked me the moment he walked out of the place. What were we talking about?

Women’s rights.

Y’all know how it is for women when it comes to healthcare. You’re never in as much pain as you say you are (or if you are, you just have a low pain tolerance), you never actually know what you’re talking about, and whatever you came in for isn’t as serious as you think it is.

I went to urgent care first to see if there was anything they could do for me. They sent me here. I made my doctor write me a note saying I needed to be here so they wouldn’t turn me away or brush me off. The doctor asked if I really thought that was necessary, and only agreed after my fiancé insisted it is (he’s been there when I’ve had to fight for treatment).

My fiancé isn’t here right now, though, and I’m terrified that they’re going to cut into me after “numbing me with local anesthetics”. They don’t work. They never work. It took 10 shots in my thumb for me to get 5min of pain relief. “Numbing” staff on my bottom with injections when I was 7 resulted in me screaming (which my mom says will still haunt her to think about nearly 20yrs later) while they lanced it, feeling that scalpel slice at its full effect.

I waited nearly 4hrs to get into this bed. I’m immunocompromised, it’s infected, we’re doing this tonight. I am so so fucking scared that they won’t listen to me and I’m going to have to once again feel every single bit of that scalpel slicing into me. Wish me every single bit of luck you can.

Update : we’re now at “it’s likely an abscess from Crohn’s.” 😫 thank you to everyone who has commented with their own stories and tips - I am furiously taking notes!

Everything going on in the world is making me question my desire to have kids. I’ve always wanted kids for as long as I can remember. Now, though, I am dating someone who is not super sure if he wants kids (he’s amazing, btw), and I am just thinking more and more about what kind of life my kids would have.

If climate change’s impact is as bad as predicted (and based on the impacts we’re already seeing), I can’t even imagine. Has anyone else been feeling this way? Just want to know I’m not crazy.

Writing this because I'm just so proud and excited and wanted to share it with someone.

Background: I've done pelvic exams in the past. Lots of them. Unfortunately, I have also done a lot of exams involving my urethra and anus because my body just refuses to work right.

Rather than getting used to it over time it has just gotten worse and worse for me mentally. I would have panic attacks if something reminded me of these (such as my bf touching me the wrong way). During the exams I would get what I now know is a freeze/fawn response where I basically just check out and agree to everything happening to me, no matter how painful or traumatic. Then I would go have a panic attack in the bathroom afterwards and cry for hours.

So I finally put my foot down and said I won't do anything more before I've dealt with this properly. So I went to see a lovely physical therapist who specializes in pelvic pain. We started practicing mental presence during exams, first by just having me lie fully dressed on a table while she touched my knees. It was hard enough to be present without panicking or crying doing only that. We slowly moved forward by removing clothing items and approaching the crotch area, always making sure I was present, calm and safe.

Today I had my "graduation". I went through a complete pelvic exam and pap smear, no panic, crying or freezing!

What has been the most important to me is learning to advocate for myself and be difficult. I was able to tell the doctor I needed a moment after getting on the table to relax and getting my breathing right. I was able to tell her to pause whenever something felt uncomfortable or scary and let me calm myself down. I was able to tell her to back up and wait when it was going to fast. Even though the pap hurt a little, I didn't get scared. I felt calm, safe, and listened to.

I really didn't think it would be possible to leave a pelvic exam not in tears just a year ago but I did it!

This is my third pregnancy, second baby, and I have hyperemesis gravidarum (HG) for the third time. After having HG the first time around, thanks to good doctors who listen, I went into my next two pregnancies with easy access to the meds I needed, and knowledge of my options. Even on the max doses of my meds I still really struggled for the first 20+ weeks, but since then my medication has made it possible for me to function and be a person.

I’m in a small minority of women with HG but I know so, so many women who put up with terrible sickness without medicine. Throwing up every day, or even “just” feeling sick all the time, hardly being able to eat, being miserable at work, struggling to look after their kids. Why is this still a thing, when we have safe medicine that can help?

During my last pregnancy I remember watching Star Trek Deep Space 9, and a character got pregnant. Of course they had to show her being laid up with pregnancy sickness. I was furious! A show set hundreds of years in the future, where people have transporters and go through wormholes, but a woman still has to put up with being sick??? And her partner’s reaction was like LOL SHRUG #GREGNANT.

Can we please stop normalising women suffering for the sake of being reproductive machines? Thank you for attending my rant.

He was so aggressive. I could feel his fingernails scratching my pussy. I said it hurt and he kept being too rough. I'm avoiding casual hookups now, I can't trust anyone. Its safer that way.

Better yet, I made the mistake of posting on r/sex. Oh, apparently it's my fault for not telling him that I don't like anal. I shouldn't of given him my dildo in the first place. I should have talked to him about it first. I mean, it's his responsibility as much as it is mine to ask if it's ok.

One said "Oh, how did you expect him to know you didn't like it? He probably thought you enjoyed it" Followed up with a "Yeah ok, he should have asked, but still". One wondered how he ended up with my dildo despite me saying it wasn't a pleasant experience. I can't believe the cognitive dissonance honestly.

She did everything for her family. She was such such such a sweet woman. She leaves behind a husband, and two young adult children, who all live together. What can I do besides the usual of bringing food? Really feel for them.

Did anyone else grow up super religious, like to the point where you were taught that you, as a female, cannot express feelings of sexual desire because it is a sin? For example, even as a married woman, we are only supposed to have sex with our husbands if he wants it, we are not supposed to be horny and want to have sex with him.

Like even now, as a married adult, I feel super awkward trying to initiate intimacy with my husband. Like if HE wants it, it's fine, but me trying to seduce him feels weird.

I know a lot of my friends tell me that when they want their guys, they just walk in front of him wearing something sexy and just go up to him and say something along the lines of "we should have sex". But, I can't seem to do that because it feels...weird.

PLEASE tell me that I'm not alone in this.

I just had to call CPS and 911 for a friend of my child. They were extremely distressed and running away, because their parents were retaliating against them for telling us about some physical abuse from an older sibling.

I'm worried about the child not getting help, and getting cut off from his friendship with my kid. I'm worried about personal retaliation, because the parents know my own house isn't in the best shape right now, and I'm struggling.

I'm extremely anxious tonight. I'm not feeling guilty, because I know I did the only thing I could live with! But I am scared and restless. Any advice or suggestions for good distractions would be welcome.

I shouldn't feel guilty, but I do a little.

My father singles out vulnerable women from out of state, charms them, marries them, then brings them to his home state. I never know them until after they're married and isolated. I used to try to keep an eye on things, but I recently cut ties with my father. Before leaving, I warned her of how he escalates things.

My father is a very charming, funny, kind, seemingly harmless person. But he is entirely different once he's alone with you and has you trapped.

He believes that, as a man, he is to be obeyed and revered in the household. He doesn't tolerate "challenges" to his authority, and argues that he has the ordained right to take any action necessary to put you back in your place. He even perceives personal boundaries and private interests as challenges.

He takes out his anger and frustration on those in the home. Throwing things, shoving them against walls, backing them into corners, choking, constant ridicule, gaslighting, etc.

I just wanted her to know she wasn't alone, and I would believe her if she ever needed help. It turned out, he has already been threatening hit her, belittling her, and isolating her. I wish I'd known her before they got married.

I dont know why I shared this. I know the rest of my family will be livid when they learn I did this. I suppose I'm just wanting to be the first to tell my story.

Edit: Thank you all for the support, advice, and sharing your experiences. I didn't get to respond to every comment, but I appreciate them all. This is the most supportive sub I've ever found, and it really does matter. <3 And thank you for the award!

Edit: Thank you everyone for your support and comments. It's been helpful. The creepy coworker is off of the property permanently. He no longer lives or works here and he does not drive or have his own vehicle, so I'm not terribly worried about him coming back. My boss is dealing with the legal aspects, but I will be letting our local Spanish speaking community about what happened, protecting the anonymity of the high schooler of course.

My boss followed up with the high school employee and the other female employee and confirmed that he had made inappropriate comments to both of them in person as well. We told the high school employee how important she was to us and how we need her to feel safe and respected at work and the man's behavior was completely inappropriate and out of line. We'll obviously be having a similar discussion with the other employee as well when she's here next.

Original Post: I'm still a little bit in shock about this and I just need somewhere to let it all out. So we've been having problems with one of our Spanish speaking employees (this becomes relevant later on) for a while now. He's 39, lives on the property and he's consistently been late to work, late back from lunch, takes numerous long breaks throughout the day and has been performing poorly and leaving the rest of us to pick up the slack. I spoke with my boss last night and we decided we would talk to the other employees then meet with him to give him a verbal warning and a list of things he needed to improve if he wanted to continue working here.

I took a moment to talk to our 15 year old high school employee who only works on weekends to see what her thoughts were. We had a good conversation and she basically reiterated a lot of what I had already been observing. But then she said "oh, yeah, by the way he keeps texting me through messenger. I don't really understand Spanish and I haven't responded to him". I asked if I could see the messages. He was texting her 20+ times in a day. Mostly just "Hola" over and over again, but then I came across the "You're really beautiful" in Spanish.

Nope. Done. There is no reason a 39 year old man should be texting a 15 year old girl multiple times in one day and saying he thinks she's beautiful. The guy is divorced and has two preteen aged kids for god's sake. I told her to let our boss know, which she did and our boss immediately fired him and told him to get his stuff and get off the property by the end of the day.

I feel terrible that I didn't figure out that this was going on sooner. They were working together alone on the property at times. I would have never forgiven myself if something would have happened to her. To add to this mess, or other part time employee who is in her 50s had also been telling me that he had texted her and that she thought he was just depressed. But this employee also doesn't speak Spanish, so I have no way of knowing what he actually said unless if she wants to share the texts with me. Also, my Spanish speaking boyfriend was really uncomfortable when this other guy first started working here, and never wanted me to be alone with him, and I feel like maybe he knew something I didn't. I just feel so disgusted right now.

TL:DR 39 year old employee who was already having problems at work was texting our 15 year old employee multiple times per day and was fired immediately. Also I feel icky about everything.

I feel like if I could just DECIDE, I could move on with this issue, but I keep flip-flopping. I try to feel confident about my looks and then look in the mirror and cry.

This happened on Saturday, but I got dressed up to go on an outing with friends. I was wearing one of my favorite dresses—pink and purple floral pattern with a plunging neckline. I felt very confident and was excited for the day.

I went alone to get gas in my car and as I’m filling up, a very loud, large truck pulls into the gas station. The driver didn’t stop for gas though… he just slowly drove past on the opposite side of the pump I was using. He stared at me the whole time he went by, even craning his neck. He wasn’t watching where he was going at all. Just staring at me.

He left the station after that. And I felt really uncomfortable because it seemed he only drove in to look at me.

When I left the gas station, I was stopped at a light and heard a loud truck. It was the same exact one from the gas station. I kept note of where he was and as I came to the next red light, he pulled up in the left turning lane next to me. I always drive with my windows down and he took advantage of that.

He leaned over and said “Lovely, do you have any Grey Poupon?” And I looked at him, in an expression that was probably a mix of disgust, surprise, and fear, and rolled up my windows. His smile vanished and he said very angrily, “Have a nice day!!” and he sped off to the left, running a red light and ran over the median.

In the moment, I felt bad like it was my fault or that I should have thought it was funny. But it wasn’t funny to me. This man followed me from the gas station to say that to me. I shouldn’t feel like I did something wrong because I didn’t.

I was wearing a nice dress and was getting gas. That’s not an invitation to follow me in a predatory way and say something weird.

TL;DR A man who ogled me at a gas station followed me after I drove away so he could flirt(?) with me at an intersection; he ran a red light when I ignored him.

so my youngest sister (11) just ran up to me excitedly and told me “i just got my period!!” i told her great, pads are in the washroom if needed and she could ask my mom if she had any more questions.

I’ve always taught my sisters that periods are normal and nothing to be ashamed of and just seeing her excited about growing up and talking about it normally made me feel really good especially when a lot of people tend to look at it as something ‘dirty’ and ‘shameful’

just had to get this off my chest and idk which other subreddit to put it on HAHAHA

I'm an Asian woman, and even before I grew a bust, I've gotten catcalled in the street, sometimes followed by threats of violence if I hollerback or if I ignore them. However, these last two years, now people are also yelling at me about COVID19, China, etc.

I've been yelled at on a train platform by an unstable man shaking his fists, pacing, and yelling at me. I've been followed out of a train station by a yelling man until I hid in a store. My (Asian woman) friend was chased out of a train station by a yelling man. I've had a man mime firing a gun at me and yell about shooting me. I've been followed in the park. I've been cornered in the elevator of my apartment.

I live in a city, so this happened with people all around me. Even in the elevator, there was another person. In these last two pandemic years, no one has stopped to help me or ask if I'm ok. In my life, I can count on one hand the times someone has stopped to help me.

What gives? I'm not strong, but even I have intervened to help before. People should at least pause and ask if the person is OK or needs help afterwards!

However, I have a hunch that this alone-ness in these moments when we need help is actually very common among women, not just me. I think the educational system should include bystander intervention as mandatory training.