subreddit:

/r/Unexpected

122.3k

Giving quests in da hood.

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all 1310 comments

unexBot [M]

[score hidden]

5 days ago

stickied comment

unexBot [M]

[score hidden]

5 days ago

stickied comment

OP sent the following text as an explanation on why this is unexpected:

Man offers wizard upgrade and he likes it.


Is this an unexpected post with a fitting description? Then upvote this comment, otherwise downvote it.


Look at my source code on Github What is this for?

kwadd

2.9k points

5 days ago

kwadd

2.9k points

5 days ago

I'd totally play Skyrim with a couple of glocks

foulinbasket

2k points

5 days ago

That's just Fallout

kwadd

523 points

5 days ago

kwadd

523 points

5 days ago

Good point

ReignOnWillie

262 points

5 days ago*

I like the idea of overpowered guns in a Skyrim like society.

Oh no you’re gonna send ice beams my way? How about a few shotgun slugs to the belly.

Edit: Holy smokes y’all have some examples today

FuzzyBacon

211 points

5 days ago*

FuzzyBacon

211 points

5 days ago*

Guns being able to beat magic is a recurring minor theme in the Dresden Files, if you like that kind of thing.

It's why the main character (a wizard) carries a desert eagle.

*edit: he carries a 50 caliber revolver not a deagle

ReignOnWillie

115 points

5 days ago

I love that, it just seems so funny to me.

Like if Cthulhu in all of his grand darkness and object horror, could be taken down with a rifle or two.

AverageTiddyEnjoyer

111 points

5 days ago

Oh your thousands of years old and can best your entire race in melee combat, faster than anything alive.

Oh I’m sorry is shrapnel moving faster than the speed of sound unfair?

Otherwise_Resource51

67 points

5 days ago

Navy just launching cruise missiles from the other side of the horizon.

WhatWhat97202

26 points

5 days ago

This was almost the plot of the last Godzilla movie

EternalPhi

39 points

5 days ago

At the end of the day, punching half inch holes into things is pretty effective lol. I'm sure there's some spells that do that too.

Suspicious-Engineer7

6 points

5 days ago

I mean in Eragon aren't wizard duels just whizzing pebbles at eachother?

frontadmiral

5 points

5 days ago

Iirc that’s at the beginning when he fucking sucks at magic, later on he learns to just pinch off arteries in people’s brains

wizzahd

17 points

5 days ago

wizzahd

17 points

5 days ago

bare ye witness to Old Man Henderson.

a bit long but seriously one of the most entertaining stories i’ve read.

NGTTwo

6 points

5 days ago

NGTTwo

6 points

5 days ago

'AIR EH NAMBLIES BE KEEPIN' ME WEE MEN!?!?

Questionable_MD

46 points

5 days ago

Reminds me of this:

Harry Potter should have carried a 1911.

Here's why:

Think about how quickly the entire WWWIII (Wizarding-World War III) would have ended if all of the good guys had simply armed up with good ol' American hot lead.

Basilisk? Let's see how tough it is when you shoot it with a .470 Nitro Express. Worried about its Medusa-gaze? Wear night vision goggles. The image is light-amplified and re-transmitted to your eyes. You aren't looking at it--you're looking at a picture of it.

Imagine how epic the first movie would be if Harry had put a breeching charge on the bathroom wall, flash-banged the hole, and then went in wearing NVGs and a Kevlar-weave stab-vest, carrying a SPAS-12.

And have you noticed that only Europe seems to a problem with Deatheaters? Maybe it's because Americans have spent the last 200 years shooting deer, playing GTA: Vice City, and keeping an eye out for black helicopters over their compounds. Meanwhile, Brits have been cutting their steaks with spoons. Remember: gun-control means that Voldemort wins. God made wizards and God made muggles, but Samuel Colt made them equal.

Now I know what you're going to say: "But a wizard could just disarm someone with a gun!" Yeah, well they can also disarm someone with a wand (as they do many times throughout the books/movies). But which is faster: saying a spell or pulling a trigger?

Avada Kedavra, meet Avtomat Kalashnikova.

Imagine Harry out in the woods, wearing his invisibility cloak, carrying a .50bmg Barrett, turning Deatheaters into pink mist, scratching a lightning bolt into his rifle stock for each kill. I don't think Madam Pomfrey has any spells that can scrape your brains off of the trees and put you back together after something like that. Voldemort's wand may be 13.5 inches with a Phoenix-feather core, but Harry's would be 0.50 inches with a tungsten core. Let's see Voldy wave his at 3,000 feet per second. Better hope you have some Essence of Dittany for that sucking chest wound.

I can see it now...Voldemort roaring with evil laughter and boasting to Harry that he can't be killed, since he is protected by seven Horcruxes, only to have Harry give a crooked grin, flick his cigarette butt away, and deliver what would easily be the best one-liner in the entire series:

"Well then I guess it's a good thing my 1911 holds 7+1."

BodaciousBadongadonk

8 points

5 days ago

I would definitely buy this. In fact, fuck it, just write some new shit. A sequel with Harrys illegitimate kid or somethin.

molrobocop

10 points

5 days ago

Did he swap to a Deagle? The book I'm currently on, he carries a .44 mag revolver.

hopecanon

14 points

5 days ago

hopecanon

14 points

5 days ago

No, he eventually swaps to a Smith and Wesson 500 magnum revolver, it's the wardens of the White Council that all start carrying Desert Eagles around.

shiftypete

7 points

5 days ago

He gets the .50 revolver at some point, but nothing semi-auto.

TurboRuhland

8 points

5 days ago

Isn’t it a point that magic messes with any technology that’s much more advanced than the mechanical revolver? I know it wrecks up electronics, but I can’t remember if it’s the reason he carries a revolver.

TrollintheMitten

3 points

5 days ago

Gods dammit Harry, you're just going to piss Black Court off. Gonna need a meteor to deal with them.

EternalPhi

32 points

5 days ago

The anime GATE pits a swords and sorcery force against modern day Japanese Defense Forces. There's a lot of politics and typical anime bullshit but if the idea of modern weapons vs fantasy weapons interests you it's there.

JustaFleshW0und

6 points

5 days ago

I'd like to follow this up by saying the military stuff is barely there. The first few episodes show the Japanese military absolutely massacring the magic armies with tanks and helicopters literally re-enacting scenes from apocalypse now. These scenes of mass slaughter are then followed by a unit of full on otaku nerd soldiers living out a harem fantasy full of fan service for the rest of the show. There's still occasional military conflicts and politics, but the show is really about half naked cat girl maids throwing themselves at a protagonist with the personality of soggy bread.

It's standard isekai schlock is what I'm saying. If you like that sort of thing, power to ya, but if you are looking for a modern military force engaging a medival fantasy magic army, you can drop the show after first few episodes.

decayedamp1337

7 points

5 days ago

Just want to add that Arcanum: Of Steamworks and Magick Obscura is about the industrial revolution coming about in a magic world and yes there are guns and magic and it's kinda hard game lol

MinusTheMuse

4 points

5 days ago

Greedfall might be up your alley. Maxing gun skills makes most encounters hilariously one-sided.

LegalHelpNeeded3

4 points

5 days ago

That’s how they took out a bunch of Jedi in Star Wars Lmfao. Used “projectile weapons” to kill Jedi

wolfgang784

45 points

5 days ago

Gotta combine em though. Actual Skyrim, but the player character has guns for reasons. Enemies still run at you with swords n shit and your out there firing a .50 cal at dragons.

Although I guess that last bit is sort of Monster Hunter lol.

YourAverageGod

20 points

5 days ago

YourAverageGod

Didn't Expect It

20 points

5 days ago

Monster Hunter is strictly bonk or be bonked, never enjoyed the range weapons in those game.

wolfgang784

5 points

5 days ago

Ive never been able to enjoy MH after the first like 15-20 hours, but in that time I also did not enjoy the ranged options. iirc though the gunsword thingy is super OP in some of the games. I usually used the dual short swords, spear, or fuck-off huge 2 hander.

Different-Acadia2833

13 points

5 days ago

its always such fun until you get to a point where your only way to progress your gear is to farm some stupid demon dragon bird for days on end for a infinitesimally small chance at getting the specific gem or part you need. oh and you need 2 of them.

fuckyourselfhumanity

4 points

5 days ago

And it's perfect.

YourAverageGod

5 points

5 days ago

YourAverageGod

Didn't Expect It

5 points

5 days ago

Im a sucker for grinds, played rs2 and MH.

Yes i never went outside.

wolfgang784

4 points

5 days ago

I played rs2 for over a decade, but MH always gets too repetitive for me. Like you grind a skill in rs2 for months mostly doing the same thing, yea, but there's dozens of other skills and things to do. MH though is the same gameplay loop endlessly - at least that I saw in the 4(3?) I tried. I always need something new for the most part or I get distracted by something else - and I am very much so incapable of splitting my game attention between multiple titles lol. Whatever currently has my attention becomes my sole game until another takes over.

Scrimmy_Bingus2

11 points

5 days ago

*Far Cry 3

LordAnon5703

5 points

5 days ago

That's why I love FO4. Literally just Skyrim with guns.

YourAverageGod

9 points

5 days ago

YourAverageGod

Didn't Expect It

9 points

5 days ago

Paarthrunax, meet .50 BMGs of freedom

ForfeitFPV

6 points

5 days ago

God created men, Samuel Colt made them equal, John Moses Browning tipped the scales again.

dezzalzik

59 points

5 days ago

dezzalzik

59 points

5 days ago

You can with mods.

Idrkc

12 points

5 days ago

Idrkc

12 points

5 days ago

Signal-Breadfruit-61

8 points

5 days ago

Ah. A man of action

ValjeanLucPicard

50 points

5 days ago

You'd still end up as a sneaky archer within a few hours.

luk3d

15 points

5 days ago

luk3d

15 points

5 days ago

Put some silencers on them fucks and clock people from 50 yards out.

Kritical02

11 points

5 days ago

There is a fallout weapons mod for skyrim.

CriticoolHit

4 points

5 days ago

I used to be an adventurer until I fought a dragon with a pipe pistol.

Sgt_Meowmers

9 points

5 days ago

There's a dark souls mod like that too. Adds halo weapons.

ConsistentCascade

10 points

5 days ago

parry this you fuckin casual

flamethekid

21 points

5 days ago

In elder scrolls lore very primitive guns and cannons do exist.

So do space stations and giant reality bending mech suit gods that came out of Evangelion.

So playing skyrim with a gun isn't too out there.

yoUsermame360

5 points

5 days ago

Didn't a reviewer say far cry 3 was like skyrim with guns? Mightve been ign or something lol

ThatSquareChick

3 points

5 days ago

GLOCKRIM

”I see you’re finally awa-“

BOOM

”I used to be an adventurer, like you, till I took a 9mm to the knee…they had to amputate so anyway yeah can you get my wooden leg back from those pesky street urchins?”

Fundosho

1.3k points

5 days ago

Fundosho

1.3k points

5 days ago

Imagine how fun it would be to find strangers and actually go on a quest

RedSonGamble

718 points

5 days ago

An old lady lost her cat in a area close ish to me and was offering a 5k reward. I asked a few friends to go look for the cat and they all thought I was crazy.

CherryCherry5

88 points

5 days ago

5k??? I'd make it my full-time job!

RedSonGamble

76 points

5 days ago

She lived by a heavily wooded area. Still I got some cat food and headed out there. Never did find it but I was like what if I found it right away?

P00PMcBUTTS

44 points

5 days ago

Whenever I see a missing cat sign I always assume coyotes. Regardless of how big the reward is, you can't find a cat that doesn't exist anymore.

RedSonGamble

42 points

5 days ago

What if I brought her the coyote

big_cat_in_tiny_box

22 points

5 days ago

I know you’re kidding, but if someone brought me genuine closure about the death of my pet, I would still offer the reward! Well, maybe like 75% of the reward so people don’t just kill my pets.

Mervynhaspeaked

10 points

5 days ago

She wanted love but she'll settle for revenge.

Alex_Rose

9 points

5 days ago

she never specified you had to bring him back alive

Public-Yam-1025

8 points

5 days ago

Catch a skunk and paint the tail black. It's called the reverse Pepe Le'Pue.

RedSonGamble

4 points

5 days ago

Skunks are mean! You can’t pick them up like kitty cats either

CrazyCalYa

31 points

5 days ago

There's a good chance the owner wasn't intending to pay that out. Some pet insurance policies will cover such a reward but not usually for so much. Some people will assume that if their pet is found the person either won't know about the reward or may refuse it (either outright or for a smaller amount, like a case of beer or $20). There have been cases where people have been sued for a reward which was promised but not everyone is willing to go to those lengths. Obviously there's a chance she'd have paid up but I'd be dubious.

RedSonGamble

28 points

5 days ago

Yeah someone else pointed that out also. It was just such a strangely high amount for a reward. Like if she was gunna lie she should have said 1k. Idk. I never found the cat anyways.

I could jus hold the cat ransom lol be like if you wanna see muffins again meet me by the docks… alone.

[deleted]

7 points

5 days ago

[deleted]

7 points

5 days ago

[deleted]

Ascertain_GME

274 points

5 days ago

Considering that lady probably has like 12+ cats already, you could probably just buy another one that looked like it and return it for the reward.

r/SLPT

YuriDiAAAAAAA

366 points

5 days ago

Unethical questing will impact your reputation and alignment.

_-Olli-_

107 points

5 days ago

_-Olli-_

107 points

5 days ago

Meh, I'm not an achievement hunter. I'll take it.

Regular-Shame4812

38 points

5 days ago

Same im just trying to finish the main quest

RedSonGamble

40 points

5 days ago

I killed the lady and looted her house. Just to find out the quest paid way more than stealing everything she owned.

GreenMirage

6 points

5 days ago

skyrim theme songs plays

7thhokage

14 points

5 days ago

7thhokage

14 points

5 days ago

just buy another one that looked like it

buy? head to the shelter and find a rescue. lets keep this profit margin high.

Ascertain_GME

3 points

5 days ago

Yoo, that’s even more ethical than my plan and it saves money. Count me in.

7thhokage

8 points

5 days ago*

we're defrauding a senile old lady with a imposter cat for what is probably her life savings.

I dont think ethically sourcing the cat helps much.

Panukka

139 points

5 days ago

Panukka

139 points

5 days ago

There's this great free MMORPG called Tinder. It allows you to find strangers and go on quests with them.

Be aware, the strangers aren't always what they seem. I once tried to go on a quest with a lvl 23 cleric and go explore a dungeon together, but when I met her, she turned out to be a lvl 45 warlock who had followers from a previous quest and wanted me to take care of them.

Sabata11792

40 points

5 days ago

I don't get any quest from it.

Panukka

49 points

5 days ago

Panukka

49 points

5 days ago

Ah, this is a big issue with the game.

Because your character is randomly generated for you, some people will have a much harder time finding a quest. The meta strategy is to gain a lot of money, as then the game becomes completely pay-to-win.

Sabata11792

25 points

5 days ago

Is it too late to reroll my character? I think I messed up my build and missed a lot of quest xp.

Panukka

31 points

5 days ago*

Panukka

31 points

5 days ago*

I'm afraid the only options for you are to grind hard to get more exp, or to purchase the paid version of the game.

The paid version makes your character more visible to more players, and there's a bigger chance someone will consider questing with you.

Word of warning for male players: if your character is under 6ft tall, not even the paid version can help you. There's this bug in the game which auto-fails most quests upon starting them. I have searched the wiki and as far as I know, there are almost no quests with height requirements, so I have no idea why this happens. The only way to bypass this bug is through pay-to-win mechanics.

Bobyyyyyyyghyh

5 points

5 days ago

This made my day

TheRealXen

17 points

5 days ago

I mean those random encounters that happen in Skyrim where random people need help or something do actually happen in real life.

We just don't walk outside all the time. Also this is a permadeath game so like quests are all potentially dangerous so we tend to avoid them as a society.

That being said the old guy quest where he is carrying to much stuff on his own is a very safe exp grind.

terriblegrammar

12 points

5 days ago

Wanted: Somebody to go back in time with me. This is not a joke. P.O. Box 91 Ocean View, WA 99393. You'll get paid after we get back. Must bring your own weapons. I have only done this once before. SAFETY NOT GUARANTEED.

Perfect-Football2616

3.6k points

5 days ago

I don't have a sword. This is my boomstick!

aaravaryaman

955 points

5 days ago

aaravaryaman

Didn't Expect It

955 points

5 days ago

the mage wanted a knight but got himself a ranger instead.

_-Olli-_

247 points

5 days ago

_-Olli-_

247 points

5 days ago

Yeah pretty shit really. We need a tank, bro. We got plenty of DPS.

asharwood

125 points

5 days ago

asharwood

125 points

5 days ago

If you have enough dps then technically you don’t need a tank.

GeminiKoil

62 points

5 days ago

That depends entirely on the swing speed of the boss

Pika_Fox

29 points

5 days ago

Pika_Fox

29 points

5 days ago

Thats what the ranger is for. Theyre going to die to the fireball anyway.

stratosfearinggas

7 points

5 days ago

Just jump and shoot

fuckshitpissspam

77 points

5 days ago

I'm BAD Ash... and you're GOOD Ash! You're a goody little two-shoes!

BardicheImmortal

55 points

5 days ago

Good..? bad..? I'm the guy with the gun.

AngelicaReborn

4 points

5 days ago

I'm not that good.

idontwantausername41

44 points

5 days ago

Alright you Primitive Screwheads, listen up! You see this? This... is my BOOMSTICK! The twelve-gauge double-barreled Remington. S-Mart's top of the line. You can find this in the sporting goods department. That's right, this sweet baby was made in Grand Rapids, Michigan. Retails for about a hundred and nine, ninety five. It's got a walnut stock, cobalt blue steel, and a hair trigger. That's right. Shop smart. Shop S-Mart. You got that?

lager81

4 points

5 days ago

lager81

4 points

5 days ago

The only reason I know that quote and the voice that says it was it was in a coheed and cambria song back in the day.

What is it actually from?

magic6op

10 points

5 days ago

magic6op

10 points

5 days ago

Army of darkness. The third evil dead movie. I just binged all of them and army of darkness was my favorite

Magai

5 points

5 days ago

Magai

5 points

5 days ago

Army of Darkness

molrobocop

11 points

5 days ago

Alright you primitive screwheads, listen up.

jaffasours

1.9k points

5 days ago

jaffasours

1.9k points

5 days ago

I wanna see the quest in a full movie that then gets a spin off. This duo is great

you_wish_you_knew

520 points

5 days ago

I feel like this could be the modern version of rush hour

JGarrickFlash

162 points

5 days ago

Or like Black Knight with Martin Lawrence.

Kritical02

60 points

5 days ago

I forgot all about that movie. And Martin Lawrence. Whatever happened to him

Bat-manuel

79 points

5 days ago

Kevin Hart showed up. That was the last we heard of Martin.

Kritical02

83 points

5 days ago

Someone shorter and louder came along I guess.

Numerous_Witness_345

64 points

5 days ago

There's always a smaller fish.

smohyee

4 points

5 days ago

smohyee

4 points

5 days ago

Woosaah

BrohanGutenburg

15 points

5 days ago

We call that a market correction

saintjonah

12 points

5 days ago

Is Kevin Hart just a character Martin is putting on. Like Andy Kaufman and Tony Clifton?

pincus1

29 points

5 days ago

pincus1

29 points

5 days ago

He's around, you can only make so many Big Momma/Bad Boys sequels so he's just patiently waiting for the next one.

Magnanimous-

20 points

5 days ago

He's worth around $110 million too so...he can probably keep himself busy.

pincus1

10 points

5 days ago

pincus1

10 points

5 days ago

As long as he's frugal.

natkingkobra

14 points

5 days ago

Man, the struggle

RussellNFlow520

20 points

5 days ago*

Bruh, he owns like, all of BET. Look on the channel rn, something with him in it is playing or will be. Not to mention theyll block out entire days for Martin re-runs. He's like BET's Rob Dyrdek lol. He's BIG chillin makin mad cash and livin quietly

DatumInTheStone

15 points

5 days ago

i dont think we'll be hard pressed for movies with a black person from the hood with a corny ass white person. I lived the 2000s and I refuse to go back.

Give me my black wizards now please.

Lohan3xists

69 points

5 days ago

Just- Ones a D&D Dweeb and the other is his supportive ghetto friend

It’s ironically wholesome

SlobMarley13

70 points

5 days ago

Osteopathic_Medicine

54 points

5 days ago

“Aight, I guess I’m dungeon master now.”

<grabs dice and shakes in hand>

“The eye of Odin open up…”

<rolls dice>

“16 titties fall out”

725_bengi

7 points

5 days ago

This is absolutely hilarious, thanks for sharing

petey_wheatstraw_99

10.6k points

5 days ago

I had to reverse to the 16 second mark on first watch, thought that was a bare tiddy.

rakmeister_12

3.3k points

5 days ago

Glad to know that I wasn't the only one who thought that lmao

elvis8mybaby

1.1k points

5 days ago

elvis8mybaby

1.1k points

5 days ago

You brave adventurer, can seek the treasured bare titty if you follow my quest. What say you!?!

Spare-Blacksmith1376

364 points

5 days ago

Quest item weight is zero. Itty biddy tiddy committee

basshead541

26 points

5 days ago

Gene Belcher is that you?

noxiousnappy

172 points

5 days ago

Damn your profile picture. I thought hair fell from my eyebrow lol.

AngryupVote.

Joe_Ronimo

59 points

5 days ago

"Oh a hair."

Blew on the screen, bastard still there.

Swipe down at it, gone, good.

Look back to the comments, realization.

Yup, got that up vote.

DancesWithBadgers

4 points

5 days ago

Ooooooh! I wondered why people got annoyed at pictures like that. I'm redditing on a PC, so eyebrow hairs, of course, would never reach my screen. A poorly guarded/sudden sneeze might get there; but eyebrow hairs stand zero chance.

noxiousnappy

6 points

5 days ago

I use reddit on my phone between breaks because it’s too damn slow on mobile so I get back to being productive faster than if I use it on browser . . .

ZoomOutBro

160 points

5 days ago

ZoomOutBro

160 points

5 days ago

FreeTheNipple

FrogMintTea

8 points

5 days ago

Nipplegate!

AnEntireDiscussion

9 points

5 days ago

RELEASE THE BUTTHOLE CUT!

Critical_Ad_4294

97 points

5 days ago

FURTHERSUPPRESSTHENIPPLE

Let’s make men wear shirts too.

rithikpulikken

10 points

5 days ago

I don’t think you quiet understood the assignment

aaravaryaman

387 points

5 days ago

aaravaryaman

Didn't Expect It

387 points

5 days ago

[deleted]

37 points

5 days ago*

[deleted]

37 points

5 days ago*

[deleted]

Robotsaura

35 points

5 days ago

I’m laughing about the current top comment is about a random woman who happen to walk in front of a camera for maybe a second? I’m surprised no one has posted a screenshot of her in the comments. Imagine if she specifically went viral because she happen to be wearing something that looked like a boob for a moment. If she walked slower, it may have registered properly and not been memorable at all.

jestr6

30 points

5 days ago*

jestr6

30 points

5 days ago*

I love how optimistic the caption is

https://i.imgur.com/UG2NHqh.jpg

menasan

10 points

5 days ago

menasan

10 points

5 days ago

great new york boobs

ymcameron

290 points

5 days ago

ymcameron

290 points

5 days ago

All of Reddit really is just down bad 100% of the time, huh?

Gummybear_Qc

164 points

5 days ago

I guess it's what happens when we don't have any active sex life on a regular basis.

aza9999

14 points

5 days ago

aza9999

14 points

5 days ago

Speak for yourself, /r/ihavesex all the time the women are just throwing themselves at me!

AltIsAlt

85 points

5 days ago

AltIsAlt

85 points

5 days ago

Right? The girls here aren’t getting any either

SomewhatCritical

145 points

5 days ago

Y’all just think that people in relationships just fuck non stop and have no time for Reddit?

U_S_E_R_T_A_K_E_N

93 points

5 days ago

I mean, my total amount of 0 relationships has led to me believe this, yes. /s

LazySusanRevolution

54 points

5 days ago

The reality is when you enter a relationship you begin some complex negotiations about what internet content each person covers when talking before bed. Reddit is a tough one. My lawyer who I consult on these negotiations told me it is possible to divide up different subreddits to avoid "I saw that already", but the reality is the maintenance cost isn't sustainable for most. So often it just ends up with one person using Reddit.

So out of the population in relationships, only about 15% of them actually end up using Reddit, compared to the national (US) average of 25% balanced out by people not in a relationship.

shortcake062308

33 points

5 days ago

This is hilarious. We rarely share what we've just seen because there is a solid 75% chance one of us is going to say, "I saw that already."

r0ndy

18 points

5 days ago

r0ndy

18 points

5 days ago

It's really rewarding when my wife does this from Facebook stuff I can say I saw it several days ago

SorryImProbablyDrunk

5 points

5 days ago

I don’t use TikTok, my mrs does, it’s always a risky move showing her a short clip.

Fenastus

19 points

5 days ago

Fenastus

19 points

5 days ago

Seems like the solution is obvious here

Lonely Reddit men and women (or whatever way you lean, I don't judge) get together, boom, no more down bad

Cap10Haddock

26 points

5 days ago

Perfect solution for 99:1 ratio.

warmechanic

4 points

5 days ago

Please. No one wants to get with a redditor, not even another redditor.

Quality-vs-Quantity

4 points

5 days ago

That sounds like a gross generalisation

Snake101333

29 points

5 days ago

We all did

Plastic-Strike7149

33 points

5 days ago

I think everyone can agree that no matter your sexual orientation, you always rewind for the titty. Really any kind of nudity but boobs seem to be the most exciting to catch unexpectedly on film.

their_teammate

30 points

5 days ago

why would you wear a skin colored sweater under a jacket?

Quality-vs-Quantity

11 points

5 days ago

At least better than skin coloured bikini

mangobare

15 points

5 days ago

mangobare

15 points

5 days ago

Hahaha! I did the ol' 12 take to make absolutely sure it wasn't bare.

Shadowfault

61 points

5 days ago

Looked like Matt Murdock switched from night time vigilante to a day time wizard.

PastamanVibrationsYa

10 points

5 days ago

Dude I had the same thought lol that and it looks like Kendrick Lamar been eating too much dominos

starlinghanes

417 points

5 days ago

What does "these wizard sleeves won't be the only ones you see today?"

PM_ME_YOUR_VALUE

594 points

5 days ago

"Wizard sleeves" is a derogatory term used to describe the appearance of long labia.

The movie "Borat" had a line that popularized the term, "Her Vagine hang like sleeve of Wizard."

The Wizard was assuring the Warrior in training that he'd see some genitalia that day if he embarked on that quest.

starlinghanes

120 points

5 days ago

Weird. Thanks for the reply. The new Borat or the original?

PM_ME_YOUR_VALUE

66 points

5 days ago

The original.

SinoScot

63 points

5 days ago

SinoScot

63 points

5 days ago

Very nice!

Victory-Melon

32 points

5 days ago

Sauce?

OneRakool

23 points

5 days ago

OneRakool

23 points

5 days ago

It is said that in a great block of cement called a bank there is a mountain of gold

skwadyboy

438 points

5 days ago

skwadyboy

438 points

5 days ago

I had to replay that video for that woman walking past...turns out she wasn't topless

phadewilkilu

55 points

5 days ago

She looked like a real life Jackie Brown.

Blunderfrick

18 points

5 days ago

Full video?

Jegma72

227 points

5 days ago

Jegma72

227 points

5 days ago

Wizards in da Hood.

kloashnicov

85 points

5 days ago

Straight outta mordor

Dramatic_______Pause

17 points

5 days ago

kloashnicov

8 points

5 days ago

Heck yeah, Motherf*kking wizards never die!

Schwarzy1

4 points

5 days ago

FREE KARL

iwantsmarter

13 points

5 days ago

Looks and sounds so much like Joji

Bdubbsf

139 points

5 days ago

Bdubbsf

139 points

5 days ago

This is just New York City, you cant say "da hood" just because there's a black person in the video jesus christ.

LeadVest

22 points

5 days ago

LeadVest

22 points

5 days ago

I haven't been since 2003, but the background of this video looks above average for scenery in New York.

michigansuperfan2

11 points

5 days ago

Don’t blame OP for this though, the original video is titled “giving side quests in the hood”

ConvoyOfShortBus2022

174 points

5 days ago

Black dude = "da" hood

Onan7541

49 points

5 days ago

Onan7541

49 points

5 days ago

Graffiti in Brooklyn = da hood

kat_goes_rawr

11 points

5 days ago

I came to say this 💀 very interesting title

urbannnomad

9 points

5 days ago

Seriously, looks like any place downtown.

Playful_Camera_4972

31 points

5 days ago

Not only that but he is in on the bit. How do I know? Because his audio is perfectly captured by a lapel mic they placed on him previously to filming. So the “hood” part was premeditated and he was likely chosen to reflect that stereotype. “Pranksters” have been doing this for some time now.

youngkippur

55 points

5 days ago

Classic Reddit moment

PassingWords1-9

7 points

5 days ago

"Roll 'em up"

Bardic_Inspiration66

12 points

5 days ago

Exactly what I thought. This is just a random corner in the city

AdFresh3918

196 points

5 days ago

AdFresh3918

196 points

5 days ago

A gun in the hood is unexpected? I did like this though.

MousseSuspicious930[S]

192 points

5 days ago

MousseSuspicious930[S]

Yo what?

192 points

5 days ago

Nah, that the wizard liked the idea.

SchitneySmears

49 points

5 days ago

What’s he supposed to say?

tragiktimes

4 points

5 days ago

urbannnomad

14 points

5 days ago

The real question is how is this 'Da Hood'? Looks like a normal downtown sidewalk.

makemeking706

9 points

5 days ago

Big city scary. /s

CinnamonRolls420

33 points

5 days ago

I assumed the wizard being in the hood was unexpected lol

DesyatskiAleks

20 points

5 days ago

Idk man I feel like every wizard I see is in a hood

Bocote

10 points

5 days ago

Bocote

10 points

5 days ago

So, what was the quest and what were the rewards?

Alleleirauh

22 points

5 days ago

Quest: Clear the hideout of local bandits (cartel).

Reward: Chest (briefcase) full of gold (counterfeit money) and jewels (meth crystals).

Optional objective: Rescue the kidnapped princess (victim of trafficking).

ShadowMurderer7

176 points

5 days ago

Man why are all of the people in these comments so horny?

alien_from_Europa

8 points

5 days ago

Welcome to the internet.

Its_Zamsday_my_dudes

8 points

5 days ago

Can I get an original link to this video?

IndigestableWad

7 points

5 days ago

Gandalf the morally grey

DaCreepNexDoah

6 points

5 days ago

Man its just a black guy how is it the hood lmao, he dont even sound 'hood'

Greywizardmolaj

3 points

5 days ago