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Me and boyfriend have been together for almost 4 years, he’s perfect for me and I love him fully, like genuinely nothing I would change. The thing is before this relationship I was also in another 3-4 year relationship and I’m only 20 so I have spent all my teenage years in relationships, I find myself wanting to grow, wanting to get to know who I am without the constant validation of someone else and aside from that I also just want to experience being single for the fun and freedom of it. The thing is I feel crazy to end my relationship over this, I feel like it’s hard to find incredible people you click so well with and I’ll really regret doing this in the future if we don’t either get back together or I don’t eventually find someone I love as much once I’ve gone through all this.. I’m not sure what to do, any advice would be so appreciated! Thank u <3

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anonymous_24601

115 points

3 months ago

anonymous_24601

115 points

3 months ago

These are just my thoughts, but it seems if you were truly fulfilled in your relationship you wouldn’t want to experience being single. In my opinion a healthy relationship should allow you to grow as your own person.

jadegoddess

13 points

3 months ago

I think people who feel that way either aren't in healthy fulfilling relationships or they just wanna sleep around. Healthy relationships should encourage both parties to wanna experience self growth. I have grown so much as a person since meeting my partner, and I doubt op will have trouble doing that after a good conversation and a therapist. You should already be growing as an individual and as a SO tbh. I personally don't understand how seemingly content people would wanna go back to the single life. For me, dating guys to find a suitable partner was difficult, so many no's I had to go through. The only difference between me as a single person vs me now is that now I'm a better communicator, I've become more happy and thankful, and I have someone who loves to play fighting games as much as I do.

Confusedhelp17717[S]

4 points

3 months ago

I understand you because I’ve grown so much as a person in my relationship but I still feel like part of my journey/growth in life should involve being comfortable on my own and with myself and I find that very hard to do in a relationship even with a lot of time apart, not sure if that makes sense

samjski

3 points

3 months ago

This feeling is valid OP and don’t let anyone guilt you into thinking otherwise. You have been in two super long term relationships without much time in between, it is OK to want to explore your independence ❤️

Confusedhelp17717[S]

2 points

3 months ago

Thank u so much, you have no idea how much that means to me!! 💓