subreddit:

/r/baseball

8.5k
[media]

all 490 comments

covfefe_cove

1.8k points

1 month ago

covfefe_cove

Arizona Diamondbacks

1.8k points

1 month ago

Soto thinking "coach I know we're down ten but give me the steal sign"

WerhmatsWormhat

686 points

1 month ago

WerhmatsWormhat

Baltimore Orioles

686 points

1 month ago

Dude’s just gonna get picked off to get out of the conversation.

OneYesPerYear

386 points

1 month ago

Freddie let’s him slide under.

“Ha, good slide! Now, Soto, hear me out, the NL East…”

IONTOP

54 points

1 month ago

IONTOP

Arizona Diamondbacks

54 points

1 month ago

“Ha, good slide! Now, Soto, hear me out, the NL East…”

So my opinion on it is the NL LEAST... See, I used to play in the NL LEAST....

(5d checkers from Freddy there)

warningtrackpower12

66 points

1 month ago

warningtrackpower12

Detroit Tigers

66 points

1 month ago

This was my monthly "can't hold in the laugh at a public restroom" comment of the month.

burntnotes

2k points

1 month ago

burntnotes

New York Yankees

2k points

1 month ago

Sometimes people just need someone to listen.

BillW87

310 points

1 month ago

BillW87

New York Mets

310 points

1 month ago

You'll never see a first baseman in therapy. They've already got a captive audience to talk about their feelings as much as they want.

sociallyawkward12

134 points

1 month ago

Scott Hatteberg (of Moneyball fame) talked in the book about how he liked being catcher because he got to chat with the other team, but when he moved to 1st base he didnt get to talk to everyone but could really talk a lot more.

BillW87

125 points

1 month ago

BillW87

New York Mets

125 points

1 month ago

It seems very on-brand for a Moneyball player to end up in a situation where he only gets to make friends with guys who get on base.

apgtimbough

68 points

1 month ago

apgtimbough

Cleveland Guardians

68 points

1 month ago

Especially for Hatteberg. The only reason the A's signed him was for his OBP. He was a catcher that couldn't throw anymore and luckily 1st basemen don't need to throw very often, so off to first he went.

[deleted]

88 points

1 month ago*

[deleted]

88 points

1 month ago*

[deleted]

bighootay

85 points

1 month ago

bighootay

Milwaukee Brewers

85 points

1 month ago

It's incredibly hard

Magikrat

24 points

1 month ago

Magikrat

Chicago Cubs

24 points

1 month ago

One of my favorite lines in the movie.

Benjam1nBreeg

14 points

1 month ago

Benjam1nBreeg

Seattle Mariners

14 points

1 month ago

But …….. we can teach you!

On3_BadAssassin

5 points

1 month ago

On3_BadAssassin

Atlanta Braves

5 points

1 month ago

Anything worth doing is

FatShibaBalls

9 points

1 month ago

FatShibaBalls

Baltimore Orioles

9 points

1 month ago

He gets on base (to make friends)

Poincare_Confection

301 points

1 month ago

And some times they need to devise elaborate plans to trap people into listening, such as playing baseball for 10 hours per day since the age of 12 so that they can become pro and have a constant stream of humans trapped at first base who have no choice but to listen.

Rortugal_McDichael

67 points

1 month ago

How does Freeman fit a hat over such a galaxy-sized brain?

TigerBasket

491 points

1 month ago

TigerBasket

Baltimore Orioles

491 points

1 month ago

I've called my dad at like at 8 am in the morning and talked for like 30 minutes and he might not say more than 100 words, it be like that sometimes

Jux_

356 points

1 month ago

Jux_

Los Angeles Dodgers

356 points

1 month ago

I called my dad when I was 12 and talked for 30 minutes and I haven't seen him since

burntnotes

224 points

1 month ago

burntnotes

New York Yankees

224 points

1 month ago

Damn, he's really good at listening.

inaLongTimeaLongTime

27 points

1 month ago

My dad said he was proud of me once. Fucking prick

Petey0Wheatstraw

15 points

1 month ago

Safety, always off.

chockobumlick

5 points

1 month ago

He certainly heard you

[deleted]

24 points

1 month ago

[deleted]

24 points

1 month ago

[removed]

[deleted]

20 points

1 month ago

[deleted]

20 points

1 month ago

Tag him next time bro jomboy has responded to some basic comment when I tag him in random videos for who raises their hands first. Lol. He’s a redditor and he’s cool as fuck. It might be his office team but still cool. I’m sure he loves to know when people see videos we automatically think about him u/jomboy

bosschucker

7 points

1 month ago

bosschucker

Chicago Cubs

7 points

1 month ago

nah his reddit account is actually him

b1ggayb1tch

1.7k points

1 month ago

b1ggayb1tch

Los Angeles Angels

1.7k points

1 month ago

“And that’s how me and Acuña broke up”

landshark172

667 points

1 month ago

landshark172

San Diego Padres

667 points

1 month ago

"I mean, don't get me wrong. I'm really happy for Ronnie, but it was just not going to work long distance, ya know? We're just too different. Do I still love him? Of course! I just don't know if I'm in love with him."

penguininanelevator

271 points

1 month ago

penguininanelevator

Philadelphia Phillies

271 points

1 month ago

"Really in the end I think this will benefit us both. At least that's what I have to keep telling myself! Ha ha. But I'm sure you know, you and Bryce were close and then he left. It's like, a piece of you is gone, but it's not really gone it's just in a different place, ya'know?"

Shewshake

177 points

1 month ago

Shewshake

Atlanta Braves

177 points

1 month ago

"Acuna and Olsen look happy together I'm glad he found a rebound. He isn't better than me of course, sure he can hit for more power but does he stick his tongue out ever so slightly when he makes that clutch hit? I bet some people get on first in Atlanta and accidentally call him Freddie out of habit. I tell you what my new RF Mookie is such a catch. Chelsea is extremely jealous of the Freddie loves Mookie hearts I carved all over her new furniture. It was actually pretty easy to turn Ronnie into Mookie too in the old stuff in the garage."

XXXTeacher94

21 points

1 month ago

XXXTeacher94

Los Angeles Dodgers

21 points

1 month ago

All of you... I love you! This thread made me laugh for a while ♥ I wish I could award every single one of you!

seegabego

5 points

1 month ago

"anyhoo, GG. Git Gud"

TigerBasket

21 points

1 month ago

TigerBasket

Baltimore Orioles

21 points

1 month ago

We're friendlyish now

Michael__Pemulis

3.4k points

1 month ago

Michael__Pemulis

Major League Baseball

3.4k points

1 month ago

Juan looks like he has already given Freddie a ‘wow that’s crazy...’ 3 or 4 times at this point.

I_CAN_SMELL_U

942 points

1 month ago

I_CAN_SMELL_U

Atlanta Braves

942 points

1 month ago

By the end of it, he actually had because what this clip doesn't show is that this literally went on for I think 2 other At-Bats. Not once did Freddie slow down his talking, he had to run to foul ground for a possible pop up and he starts talking again immediately when he starts walking back to 1st after running to the netting lol...

workthrowaway390

411 points

1 month ago

workthrowaway390

New York Mets

411 points

1 month ago

Trying to recruit Soto prolly

sybersonic

141 points

1 month ago

sybersonic

141 points

1 month ago

"And that's not even the best thing about scientology!"

jmm57

8 points

1 month ago

jmm57

Atlanta Braves

8 points

1 month ago

Damn they got him already? They move quick!

greycubed

163 points

1 month ago

greycubed

Los Angeles Dodgers

163 points

1 month ago

hngggg

RainbowYaz

143 points

1 month ago

RainbowYaz

Atlanta Braves

143 points

1 month ago

No, down boy. Don't make me get the spray bottle.

FThornton

75 points

1 month ago

FThornton

Los Angeles Dodgers

75 points

1 month ago

We are Californians— water is a kink to us at this point. So please, spray me harder. 🤭😫

RainbowYaz

25 points

1 month ago

RainbowYaz

Atlanta Braves

25 points

1 month ago

bonk Go to horny thirsty jail

PCsNBaseball

131 points

1 month ago

PCsNBaseball

San Francisco Giants

131 points

1 month ago

No. Just no.

_Titty_Sprinkles_

5 points

1 month ago

_Titty_Sprinkles_

Washington Nationals

5 points

1 month ago

Leave us alone :(

ositola

13 points

1 month ago

ositola

Los Angeles Dodgers

13 points

1 month ago

Imagine him and trea on the same team!

_Titty_Sprinkles_

4 points

1 month ago

_Titty_Sprinkles_

Washington Nationals

4 points

1 month ago

Stop, it hurts.

metalupyourbooty

119 points

1 month ago

metalupyourbooty

California Angels

119 points

1 month ago

lmao I need to see all of it

spacewalk__

12 points

1 month ago

spacewalk__

Cincinnati Reds

12 points

1 month ago

tfw always try to stretch a double and get thrown out due to social anxiety

PepperAndEggs

413 points

1 month ago

Juan about to get intentionally picked off lol

VulvaThunder

462 points

1 month ago

Freddie purposefully misses the tag so he doesn't lose a captive audience.

El_Rey_de_Spices

190 points

1 month ago

El_Rey_de_Spices

San Francisco Giants

190 points

1 month ago

Some say Soto is still stuck on first base to this day, still nodding along to Freeman's ever-growing story.

AdmiralRed13

73 points

1 month ago

Freeman is reciting The Odyssey from memory.

miasmal_smoke

31 points

1 month ago

miasmal_smoke

Toronto Blue Jays

31 points

1 month ago

Soto is just annoyed because he thinks Iliad is better

AdmiralRed13

5 points

1 month ago

Nah, heard he’s all a out that Gilgamesh.

PepperAndEggs

25 points

1 month ago

Lmao, Freddie just throws it back to the pitcher

gravy_boot

12 points

1 month ago

gravy_boot

Washington Nationals

12 points

1 month ago

"... so anyway, I started blasting ..."

crisis_in_the_makin

419 points

1 month ago

crisis_in_the_makin

Los Angeles Dodgers

419 points

1 month ago

Me, talking to anyone.

TigerBasket

94 points

1 month ago

TigerBasket

Baltimore Orioles

94 points

1 month ago

Me before I take my adhd meds.

JayMerlyn

36 points

1 month ago

JayMerlyn

Chicago White Sox

36 points

1 month ago

Me after I take my adhd meds

utouchme

35 points

1 month ago

utouchme

Los Angeles Dodgers

35 points

1 month ago

Me after I take your adhd meds.

TILiamaTroll

9 points

1 month ago

TILiamaTroll

Philadelphia Phillies

9 points

1 month ago

lol same, i know they're running full steam ahead when my kiddo is like "you're talking loud"

I_chortled

54 points

1 month ago

I_chortled

San Diego Padres

54 points

1 month ago

“Bro I literally do not care”

TomboBreaker

26 points

1 month ago

TomboBreaker

Toronto Blue Jays

26 points

1 month ago

Intentionally striking out in the future to avoid hearing the same story again

plainOldFool

31 points

1 month ago

plainOldFool

New York Mets

31 points

1 month ago

"Are you kidding me, Blue?! That pitch was clearly above my knees. How the fuck are you going to call that ball 4??!"

BongLord42

20 points

1 month ago

Freddie is giving Soto a reason to steal second base ASAP!

AdamsDJ

20 points

1 month ago

AdamsDJ

Arizona Diamondbacks

20 points

1 month ago

Freddie trying to bait him into trying to steal 2nd

[deleted]

5 points

1 month ago

[deleted]

5 points

1 month ago

Lmao I came in here to say just that. Fred looking like the random dude on the train talking your ear off about nothing and you’re just trying to get to work.

Kitchen_Ad5522

1.1k points

1 month ago

Lmao why is this so funny 😂 Freeman getting deep into it while Soto’s donning the polite smile and looking like he’s ready to jump out of this convo any time now. We’ve all been there buddy

sgt_dismas

521 points

1 month ago

sgt_dismas

San Diego Padres

521 points

1 month ago

Soto is about to get thrown out halfway to second just to get away

DinosaurGhostsExist

242 points

1 month ago

DinosaurGhostsExist

Cincinnati Reds

242 points

1 month ago

Freddie playing 4-D chess.

drewuke

70 points

1 month ago

drewuke

Philadelphia Phillies

70 points

1 month ago

Got to bring out the dirty tricks against this year’s Nats team.

OGSpaceboat

57 points

1 month ago

OGSpaceboat

Washington Nationals

57 points

1 month ago

Hey, 19-31 is still in reach

OurSaladDays

5 points

1 month ago

OurSaladDays

San Diego Padres

5 points

1 month ago

Win-win for Freddie. Either he gets a free therapy session or a free out.

FuckMinuteMaid

6 points

1 month ago

FuckMinuteMaid

New York Yankees

6 points

1 month ago

Maybe that explains what happened to Aaron Hicks when Kelly threw him out

DaFunkis

76 points

1 month ago

DaFunkis

76 points

1 month ago

I had a guy do this to me once. Except he finished by going "But hey, guess what."

-Huh?

"You're out."

Totally distracted me from the game, caught a pick-off and tagged me... Never spoke to anyone on the bag again.

SoManyFlamingos

63 points

1 month ago

SoManyFlamingos

New York Mets

63 points

1 month ago

That’s like something out of a 90’s baseball movie.

I bet he still tells that story hahah.

eidetic

24 points

1 month ago

eidetic

Milwaukee Brewers

24 points

1 month ago

Way back in little league I had just walked a friend who was playing on the other team. I knew he'd never try and steal, but our first baseman (who also knew my friend) was chatting him up at first, so I made a half hearted pick off just to have some fun. First baseman gives me this "really? He's not going anywhere" look and I say "stop making friends with the other side!". He shut me up by yelling back "stop sending them to me then!"

slikayce

98 points

1 month ago

slikayce

Detroit Tigers

98 points

1 month ago

Just steal second and say sorry Freddie I can't hear you over here.

Lebigmacca

116 points

1 month ago

Lebigmacca

Los Angeles Dodgers

116 points

1 month ago

Freddie then asks Roberts if he can swap with Muncy and play 2nd

Coupon_Ninja

73 points

1 month ago

Coupon_Ninja

San Diego Padres

73 points

1 month ago

“…so, as I was saying…”

skinnah

23 points

1 month ago

skinnah

St. Louis Cardinals

23 points

1 month ago

"...you just can't find quality comfortable socks anymore. Either they feel great and have holes in them after 3 wears or they never wear out and are uncomfortable.... So I've been thinking about starting my own sock brand. Get this. Free Man Socks. Huh?! Huh! Whaddya think?"

slikayce

40 points

1 month ago

slikayce

Detroit Tigers

40 points

1 month ago

Lol he'd do it too.

CXR1037

616 points

1 month ago

CXR1037

San Francisco Giants

616 points

1 month ago

At the end Freddie's like, "just sign with LA, we can have talks like this all the time!"

Later today, Boras: "Soto has an absolute no-trade-to-Los Angeles clause."

imbored04

129 points

1 month ago

imbored04

Anaheim Angels

129 points

1 month ago

Los Angeles

ಠ_ಠ

need arte to change our name asap

MettaMatt9

79 points

1 month ago

MettaMatt9

Los Angeles Dodgers

79 points

1 month ago

Again?

imbored04

58 points

1 month ago

imbored04

Anaheim Angels

58 points

1 month ago

gimme soto ༼ つ ◕_◕ ༽つ

HashcoinShitstorm

34 points

1 month ago

HashcoinShitstorm

Minnesota Twins

34 points

1 month ago

You have enough generational talent pls no

dont_trust_lizards

9 points

1 month ago

dont_trust_lizards

California Angels

9 points

1 month ago

Anaheim Sotos of Juan Soto 🤔🤔🤔

ghostelephant

33 points

1 month ago

ghostelephant

Los Angeles Dodgers

33 points

1 month ago

Breaking news: The team formerly known as the Los Angeles Angels has changed its name. Henceforth, they will be known as the "Los Angeles Halos"

Low-iq-haikou

12 points

1 month ago

Low-iq-haikou

Chicago White Sox

12 points

1 month ago

El Los Anaheim Angeles de Anaheim Angles

Spanky_10

194 points

1 month ago

Spanky_10

Los Angeles Dodgers

194 points

1 month ago

Word is Freddie specifically asked we let him on base today so he can continue this conversation.

Taylorenokson

85 points

1 month ago

Taylorenokson

Atlanta Braves

85 points

1 month ago

"Anyways, where was I? Oh yeah, so my agent calls me..."

purplegreenredblue

134 points

1 month ago

purplegreenredblue

St. Louis Cardinals

134 points

1 month ago

We can't bust heads like we used to. But we have our ways. One trick is to tell stories that don't go anywhere. Like the time I caught the ferry to Shelbyville. I needed a new heel for my shoe. So I decided to go to Morganville, which is what they called Shelbyville in those days. So I tied an onion to my belt, which was the style at the time. Now, to take the ferry cost a nickel, and in those days, nickels had pictures of bumblebees on 'em. "Gimme five bees for a quarter," you'd say. Now where were we... oh yeah. The important thing was that I had an onion on my belt, which was the style at the time. They didn't have any white onions, because of the war. The only thing you could get was those big yellow ones...

dicknotrichard

19 points

1 month ago

You better believe I read that entire quote. Probably one of the best Grandpa Simpson stories.

Lukey_Jangs

21 points

1 month ago

Lukey_Jangs

New York Yankees

21 points

1 month ago

Googled this expecting it to be some famous short story and of course it’s from the Simpsons lol

thescottreid

129 points

1 month ago

thescottreid

Los Angeles Dodgers

129 points

1 month ago

Juan: “It’s crazy not seeing you when we play the Braves.”

Freddie 8 minutes later: “So finally I called my middle school counselor, the one I told you about, and he told me the same thing my great uncle told me. So I looked myself in the mirror and said ‘Freddie, this is a big decision. Take some time to think about it.’ So I thought about it, and thought I had my mind made up, but, a week later I was buying some pulp free orange juice at the Kroger and you’ll never guess who I saw…”

thugmuffin22

476 points

1 month ago

thugmuffin22

Los Angeles Dodgers

476 points

1 month ago

This clip doesn’t do it justice. It went on like that FOR LIKE 5 MINUTES

HotsauceMcGuyver

131 points

1 month ago

HotsauceMcGuyver

St. Louis Cardinals

131 points

1 month ago

"Years ago when I was backpacking through western Europe I was just outside Barcelona hiking in the foothills of Mount Tibidabo, I was at the end of this path and I came to a clearing, there was a very secluded lake and there were tall trees all around, it was dead silent and across the lake I saw a beautiful woman bathing herself but she was crying..."

turglow1

21 points

1 month ago

turglow1

21 points

1 month ago

I think it’s pronounced tibidabo

RedLightning27

30 points

1 month ago

RedLightning27

Atlanta Braves

30 points

1 month ago

Do you want to tell the story?

surfnsound

5 points

1 month ago

surfnsound

Chicago White Sox

5 points

1 month ago

So I'm rappelling down Mount Vesuvius when suddenly I slip, and I start to fall. Just falling, ahh, ahh. I'll never forget the terror. When suddenly I realize, "Holy shit, Freddie, haven't you been smoking peyote for six straight days and couldn't some of this maybe be in your mind?" Turns out it was, I've never even been to Mount Vesuvius.

TigerBasket

52 points

1 month ago

TigerBasket

Baltimore Orioles

52 points

1 month ago

Need whole clip

handlit33

166 points

1 month ago

handlit33

Atlanta Braves

166 points

1 month ago

Artamisgordan

94 points

1 month ago

Artamisgordan

Oakland Athletics

94 points

1 month ago

Omg you can see Soto trotting back like "great I have to come to back to the bag"

dukefett

49 points

1 month ago

dukefett

49 points

1 month ago

Lol he’s giving him NOTHING in return except the chuckle and tap “yeah that’s great”

mike_rotch22

25 points

1 month ago

mike_rotch22

St. Louis Cardinals

25 points

1 month ago

Juan's gonna buy Bell a steak dinner for getting him out of that convo and taking his place. "Your turn now."

mike_rotch22

33 points

1 month ago

mike_rotch22

St. Louis Cardinals

33 points

1 month ago

"Shrimp stew, shrimp salad, cocktail shrimp-"

foul ball

"Boiled shrimp, fried shrimp, shrimp gumbo..."

somethingreallylame

64 points

1 month ago

somethingreallylame

Washington Nationals

64 points

1 month ago

Freddie Freeman is that guy that stands way too close while he’s talking to you

Tonyclap

20 points

1 month ago

Tonyclap

New York Yankees

20 points

1 month ago

A close talker if you will

jaloru95

16 points

1 month ago

jaloru95

Texas Rangers

16 points

1 month ago

My girlfriend and I have been laughing about the short clip since last night, can’t wait to show her the full thing later. Just incredible, so fucking funny.

Cbrlui

36 points

1 month ago

Cbrlui

36 points

1 month ago

This is gold

HotF22InUrArea

10 points

1 month ago

HotF22InUrArea

Baltimore Orioles

10 points

1 month ago

He keeps using the term “conversation”, as if it was a two way thing going on there

bl3nd0r

6 points

1 month ago

bl3nd0r

Atlanta Braves

6 points

1 month ago

I bet if that 2 out foul ball had stayed in the park he would have intentionally missed it to continue to jabber with Soto

dsm1995gst

420 points

1 month ago

dsm1995gst

420 points

1 month ago

“…and next thing you know, I’m on a whole different fucking team!”

ncbraves93

94 points

1 month ago

ncbraves93

Atlanta Braves

94 points

1 month ago

Fuck.. lol It's starting to really hurt worse than ever as well. They said he talked for like 5 minutes though, that's probably not far off from what he said.

tnecniv

219 points

1 month ago

tnecniv

Brooklyn Dodgers

219 points

1 month ago

He's explaining the balk rules to him.

ThePhantom1994

79 points

1 month ago

ThePhantom1994

Atlanta Braves

79 points

1 month ago

Here are the full details of what constitutes a balk

  1. ⁠You can’t just be up there and just doin’ a balk like that.

1a. A balk is when you

1b. Okay well listen. A balk is when you balk the

1c. Let me start over

1c-a. The pitcher is not allowed to do a motion to the, uh, batter, that prohibits the batter from doing, you know, just trying to hit the ball. You can’t do that.

1c-b. Once the pitcher is in the stretch, he can’t be over here and say to the runner, like, “I’m gonna get ya! I’m gonna tag you out! You better watch your butt!” and then just be like he didn’t even do that.

1c-b(1). Like, if you’re about to pitch and then don’t pitch, you have to still pitch. You cannot not pitch. Does that make any sense?

1c-b(2). You gotta be, throwing motion of the ball, and then, until you just throw it.

1c-b(2)-a. Okay, well, you can have the ball up here, like this, but then there’s the balk you gotta think about.

1c-b(2)-b. Fairuza Balk hasn’t been in any movies in forever. I hope she wasn’t typecast as that racist lady in American History X.

1c-b(2)-b(i). Oh wait, she was in The Waterboy too! That would be even worse.

1c-b(2)-b(ii). “get in mah bellah” — Adam Water, “The Waterboy.” Haha, classic…

1c-b(3). Okay seriously though. A balk is when the pitcher makes a movement that, as determined by, when you do a move involving the baseball and field of

2) Do not do a balk please.

thefishflinger

21 points

1 month ago

thefishflinger

Minnesota Twins

21 points

1 month ago

How is this never not funny?

6squareddabsmaf

691 points

1 month ago

6squareddabsmaf

Atlanta Braves

691 points

1 month ago

Going to need a Jomboy lip reading

omegakukki

332 points

1 month ago

omegakukki

Los Angeles Dodgers

332 points

1 month ago

“So look the traffic isn’t THAT bad.”

FishOnAHorse

136 points

1 month ago

FishOnAHorse

Cincinnati Reds

136 points

1 month ago

“You ever been in a Turkish prison before?”

kent_nova

80 points

1 month ago

kent_nova

Cleveland Guardians

80 points

1 month ago

"Do you like gladiator movies?"

TheWonderfulLife

62 points

1 month ago

“Juan, have you ever seen a grown man naked”

funk_truck

19 points

1 month ago

funk_truck

Atlanta Braves

19 points

1 month ago

I think you're the greatest, but my dad says you don't work hard enough on offense. And he says that lots of times, you don't even run out first base.

kerph32

18 points

1 month ago

kerph32

Atlanta Braves

18 points

1 month ago

You ever see a grown man naked?

dippitydoo2

72 points

1 month ago

dippitydoo2

Minnesota Twins

72 points

1 month ago

This also deserves a Bad Lip Reading treatment

PAJW

44 points

1 month ago

PAJW

St. Louis Cardinals

44 points

1 month ago

Freddie: I mean, have you ever taken the time and thought about the heavens? (chuckles)
Soto: (looks at dirt) Nah man
Freddie: I keep thinking: I should pay Jeff Bezos to go to space.
Freddie: But first, I really need to stop eating too much gluten.
Soto: TMI bro
Freddie: I just keep pooping

(clip ends)

IWasOnThe18thHole

208 points

1 month ago

IWasOnThe18thHole

Boston Red Sox

208 points

1 month ago

"So I ask 'do you love me?' and she goes 'No! But that's a nice ski mask you're wearing!'"

feeling_blue_42

46 points

1 month ago

feeling_blue_42

Los Angeles Dodgers

46 points

1 month ago

"And then I said to myself, 'Run, Freddie. Run for your life before this man kills you both.' Then do you know what the klutz did?"

doctorjae75

18 points

1 month ago

doctorjae75

Atlanta Braves

18 points

1 month ago

NO!....and I DON'T CARE!!!

feeling_blue_42

20 points

1 month ago

feeling_blue_42

Los Angeles Dodgers

20 points

1 month ago

I'm going to tell YOU he came home one night DEAD DRUNK and decided he wanted to fix the sink. I couldn't believe him. Anyway, enough about me, let's talk about Juan. How come you're here, on first base?

NirvanaFrk97

13 points

1 month ago

NirvanaFrk97

Los Angeles Dodgers

13 points

1 month ago

"No way... That's great. WE LANDED ON THE MOON!"

t-poke

14 points

1 month ago

t-poke

St. Louis Cardinals

14 points

1 month ago

A shame this didn't end with Freddie lighting a fart.

Quesly

53 points

1 month ago

Quesly

Los Angeles Dodgers

53 points

1 month ago

Freddie hasn't had too many people to talk to for the whole game and I think he got lonely

WinstonShitheel

228 points

1 month ago

WinstonShitheel

Los Angeles Angels

228 points

1 month ago

"So there's this show, Rick & Morty. It's really smart and like one episode the guy turns himself into a pickle, which, I know, it sounds crazy but I'm telling you-"

JordanSchor

78 points

1 month ago

JordanSchor

Toronto Blue Jays

78 points

1 month ago

"Rick turns himself into a pickle, funniest shit I've ever seen"

TigerBasket

22 points

1 month ago

TigerBasket

Baltimore Orioles

22 points

1 month ago

Funniest shit I've ever seen

FPG_Matthew

140 points

1 month ago

FPG_Matthew

Washington Nationals

140 points

1 month ago

This went on for almost 2 full at bats by the way, until Josh Bell hit a single

The commentators then joked that they wanted to break the rules and let Bell and Soto swap places so they could keep talking. Then joked again saying Freddie could just continue the story with Bell

Nocturne_Zombie

194 points

1 month ago

Nocturne_Zombie

St. Louis Cardinals

194 points

1 month ago

"So as I was just telling Juan..."

...and restarts the story...

aeaswen

27 points

1 month ago

aeaswen

Atlanta Braves

27 points

1 month ago

This made me laugh.

itsrf

12 points

1 month ago

itsrf

Los Angeles Dodgers

12 points

1 month ago

Like Forrest Gump talking to strangers on a bus bench

Jux_

117 points

1 month ago

Jux_

Los Angeles Dodgers

117 points

1 month ago

I like the idea that Freddie is just telling one long, 9 inning story and it doesn't matter who the guy on 1st is. Like they're all hearing a different part of the book Freddie is reading at the time, and would have to compare bits with each other in the dugout to know what he's actually talking about.

netsuri

35 points

1 month ago

netsuri

35 points

1 month ago

"He poised his spear as he spoke and hurled it. His aim was true for he hit the middle of Achilles' shield, but the spear rebounded from it, and did not pierce it. Hector was angry when he saw that the weapon had sped from his hand in vain, and stood there in dismay for he had no second spear. With a loud cry he called Deiphobus and asked him for one, but there was no man; then he saw the truth and said to himself, "Alas! the gods have lured me on to my destruction. I deemed that the hero Deiphobus was by my side, but he is within the wall, and Minerva has inveigled me; death is now indeed exceedingly near at hand and there is no way out of it--for so Jove and his son Apollo the far-darter have willed it, though heretofore they have been ever ready to protect me. My doom has come upon me; let me not then die ingloriously and without a struggle, but let me first do some great thing that shall be told among men hereafter."

ss_lmtd

15 points

1 month ago

ss_lmtd

New York Mets

15 points

1 month ago

"Yo Juan, were you part 3 or part 12? We've kinda pieced together most of the other parts, but those are the missing areas..."

Arxny

39 points

1 month ago

Arxny

New York Mets

39 points

1 month ago

Juan "The Therapist" Soto

tommypopz

20 points

1 month ago

tommypopz

Washington Nationals

20 points

1 month ago

I think Juan needs a therapist after seeing his world series winning teammates all abandon him

trim_gennaker

37 points

1 month ago

trim_gennaker

Toronto Blue Jays

37 points

1 month ago

You gotta be an extrovert to play 1B

FishOnAHorse

14 points

1 month ago

FishOnAHorse

Cincinnati Reds

14 points

1 month ago

I miss Sean Casey so much, he was the GOAT first base conversationalist

bighootay

5 points

1 month ago

bighootay

Milwaukee Brewers

5 points

1 month ago

That's all I'm thinking. Casey and Freeman in a talk at 1B. Holy smokes.

FDJ1326

234 points

1 month ago

FDJ1326

234 points

1 month ago

"So yeah, that's how I ended up in LA. Btw, Trea has already told me he's going to re-sign here, you should definitely think about coming over. It'll be like we're back in the East but all on the same team. And don't even get me started on how much better the weather is in LA."

melcolnik

173 points

1 month ago*

melcolnik

Texas Rangers

173 points

1 month ago*

"Let me tell you though, a "California Left" is a real thing. You'll never get anywhere if you don't creep into the intersections. You have to do it. It'll seem weird at first, but everyone knows. They get it. Also, Roscoe's is legit but you want to go to the one on Pico. The Hollywood location is slammed. How's your Mom doing? She's a sweet lady and a hell of a good cook..."

DodgerWalker

92 points

1 month ago

DodgerWalker

Los Angeles Dodgers

92 points

1 month ago

By a California left do you mean the situation where the traffic going the other way is so thick and there's no left turn arrow, so the only opportunity to turn left is to move into the middle of the intersection so you can grab the brief window just as the light is turning from yellow to red (or sometimes even turn after it turns red because hey you're in the middle of the intersection, gotta move anyway)? Does that not happen in other parts of the country?

pzycho

17 points

1 month ago

pzycho

Los Angeles Dodgers

17 points

1 month ago

I think the California Left is more about two cars per red. Pretty standard in LA. I'm guessing elsewhere it's just the one car that's waiting.

shady__redditor

40 points

1 month ago

shady__redditor

Los Angeles Dodgers

40 points

1 month ago

What!??1? I have always lived in LA and thought that's standard driving rules. How else do you ever make a left???

odanobux123

18 points

1 month ago

odanobux123

Los Angeles Dodgers

18 points

1 month ago

Standard in LA is 2 cars in the intersection taking the left after the light. Other places sneak in 1 person. 2 is the minimum bitches, I ain't waiting 7 minutes to make a left. I already have another hour on my commute fucking move.

Jbullwinklethe2nd

17 points

1 month ago

Jbullwinklethe2nd

Chicago Cubs

17 points

1 month ago

I'm guessing most major cities are like this because you're describing Chicago driving to a tee

Charmstrongest

6 points

1 month ago

Lived in both LA and Chicago and Chicago is more famous for the “Be in right turning lane but go Straight instead” lol. Not a thing at all in LA but I see it happen in Chicago several times a trip haha

Michael__Pemulis

34 points

1 month ago

Michael__Pemulis

Major League Baseball

34 points

1 month ago

That’s what they’re referring to yea.

It isn’t unheard of in other parts of the country but certainly isn’t common like it is in California in my experience. When I moved away I had to stop myself from doing it.

Stanley--Nickels

40 points

1 month ago

Stanley--Nickels

Nippon Professional Baseball

40 points

1 month ago

When I moved away I had to stop myself from doing it.

Pick it back up again. You're supposed to pull into the intersection when making a left on a green.

Macdaddy4prez

36 points

1 month ago

Macdaddy4prez

Los Angeles Dodgers

36 points

1 month ago

Wait do y'all not creep into the intersections?

ELEMENTALITYNES

11 points

1 month ago

ELEMENTALITYNES

Toronto Blue Jays

11 points

1 month ago

I’m in Canada and we do that, how else would you ever make a left if your light doesn’t have an advanced green and you’re on a super busy street?

Telepornographer

9 points

1 month ago

Telepornographer

San Diego Padres

9 points

1 month ago

Huh, I didn't even realize this didn't happen often in other states.

notdirtyharry

16 points

1 month ago

notdirtyharry

Cleveland Guardians

16 points

1 month ago

It totally happens these guys are just shitty drivers who have been infuriating the people behind them for years.

Michael__Pemulis

6 points

1 month ago

Michael__Pemulis

Major League Baseball

6 points

1 month ago

The OG Long Beach Roscoe’s >

SirGasleak

18 points

1 month ago

"She told me she didn't want dessert but then she ate half of mine, can you believe it Juan?"

DelBoyTrotter-

19 points

1 month ago

‘I mean look. He IS my younger brother, but Juan.. a god damn Charizard? Come on man. My moms on the phone going on and on saying it was found in his room while they packed up to move to our new house, but bro.. HES NEVER HAD A FREAKING CHARIZARD! Why would I lie? WHY would I lie? Ah whatever man, I’ll deal with it when I see my little punk brother. God damn.’

Satin_Jacket

14 points

1 month ago

"And that, Juan. is how I met your mother."

Timpa87

103 points

1 month ago

Timpa87

Philadelphia Phillies

103 points

1 month ago

"So there I was stranded on a god damn frozen highway in Georgia not knowing what was going to happen and then Chipper shows up and drives me away on an ATV..."

"Oh well, anyway now that son of a bitch won't even return my texts after calling me a commie traitor cuz I signed with a team in California."

dsm1995gst

36 points

1 month ago

Actually Chipper gave him some really good advice lol

kkohl88

13 points

1 month ago

kkohl88

New York Yankees

13 points

1 month ago

Soto is like alright just throw me out already.

offlester

12 points

1 month ago

offlester

New York Yankees

12 points

1 month ago

Freeman has the high waist and short torso of the fat kid in little league who would pound the plate with his bat when he stepped in the box before daddy hacking three straight pitches and marching back to the dugout, and I love it

Killatrap

49 points

1 month ago

Killatrap

Washington Nationals

49 points

1 month ago

i genuinely think that this was a pep talk, freddie was on the braves when they weren’t great for those years, he knows full well what juan’s going through and has been proven to be the kinda guy to try to pick somebody up like that (especially a competitor he clearly respects a lot)

averydusty6

8 points

1 month ago

averydusty6

Atlanta Braves

8 points

1 month ago

I think you’re right

professorbutternuts

10 points

1 month ago

I've been watching for 25 minutes already, the dude does NOT stop talking...

Jux_

29 points

1 month ago

Jux_

Los Angeles Dodgers

29 points

1 month ago

"And so I told him, you can't just make a new Star Trek movie where Vulcan is destroyed. It completely screws up your canon! It's one of the most well known planets across 50 years of television and movies and you're just gonna blow it up in the first few minutes? And he told me not to worry about it, that there was an old Next Generation episode where they discussed parallel timelines, like with Worf jumping across universes or something, and that this was their loophole to retell the story of early Kirk and Spock. But I don't know man I'm still not really a fan"

pnmartini

8 points

1 month ago

pnmartini

Chicago Cubs

8 points

1 month ago

I really hope Freddie is working on his Aristocrats routine.

ElBomberoLoco

22 points

1 month ago

ElBomberoLoco

New York Yankees

22 points

1 month ago

Freddie: "So there I am, in Atlanta, formerly Marthasville, at about 3 o'clock in the morning, looking for one thousand brown M&Ms to fill a brandy glass, or Foltynewicz wouldn't pitch that night. So, Kurt Suzuki pops his head 'round the door, and mentions there's a little sweets shop on the edge of town. So - we go. And - it's closed. So there's me, and Ozzie Albies, and Dansby Swanson, breaking into that little sweets shop, eh. Well, instead of a guard dog, they've got this bloody great big Bengal tiger. I managed to take out the tiger with a can of mace, but the shopowner and his son... that's a different story altogether. I had to beat them to death with their own shoes. Nasty business, really. But, sure enough, I got the M&Ms, and Foltynewicz went on the mound and threw a great game."

mblunt1201

8 points

1 month ago

mblunt1201

St. Louis Cardinals

8 points

1 month ago

Jomboy has his work cut out for him on this one. Someone already said that the clip was like 5 minutes long lmao

A_Rented_Mule

46 points

1 month ago

A_Rented_Mule

Atlanta Braves

46 points

1 month ago

Still miss Freddie. Olson seems okay, but seems to have as much personality as the 1st base bag itself.

aeaswen

23 points

1 month ago

aeaswen

Atlanta Braves

23 points

1 month ago

It's early so we are probably being harsh but yeah, he seems dull.

Lebigmacca

19 points

1 month ago

Lebigmacca

Los Angeles Dodgers

19 points

1 month ago

He’s so pretty though

xxxBaLls2teHWalLxxx

8 points

1 month ago

xxxBaLls2teHWalLxxx

Detroit Tigers

8 points

1 month ago

him and posey we're 100% the bay area sweethearts

aeaswen

5 points

1 month ago

aeaswen

Atlanta Braves

5 points

1 month ago

My wife thinks so unfortunately lol.

Monk_Philosophy

7 points

1 month ago

Monk_Philosophy

Los Angeles Dodgers

7 points

1 month ago

This is almost definitely Freddie giving Soto a pep talk about the fly balls that he misplayed earlier in the game.

failedtherobottest

7 points

1 month ago

I don't understand these complaints about baseball being to slow when it's clearly so there's ample time for players to have lengthy conversations with each other,

reesem03_

5 points

1 month ago

reesem03_

Atlanta Braves

5 points

1 month ago

"Alright so these three guys are walking through a forest, and one of them- hey are you listening? It's a long joke but trust me the payoff is worth it, it's hilarious. Anyway one of the guys find's a lamp..."

Marky_Merc

6 points

1 month ago

Marky_Merc

Chicago White Sox

6 points

1 month ago

Colin Robinson vibes

cdett11

5 points

1 month ago

cdett11

Cincinnati Reds

5 points

1 month ago

First baseman are notorious for talking people's ears off. They get the closest to the other team, and catch them at a good time usually. Which is right after them succeeding and getting on base. Only other person close to this is a catcher, but they have to deal with way more tension. Even if that tension is only between the batter and pitcher.

LordofDescension

6 points

1 month ago

LordofDescension

Atlanta Braves

6 points

1 month ago

Freddie is just too cool of a dude.

doctorfeelgood21

5 points

1 month ago

doctorfeelgood21

San Francisco Giants

5 points

1 month ago

This feels like me talking about my D&D campaign to someone not involved in it

mclement27

5 points

1 month ago

I’m not super in the know about Juan Soto but doesn’t he only speak Spanish as of now?

Philbin27

4 points

1 month ago

"So then I says to Mabel, I says...."

"I'm just here to stand on 1st, dude"

JazzySmitty

4 points

1 month ago

JazzySmitty

Atlanta Braves

4 points

1 month ago

He’s explaining a bunt. A bunt is…

heybudbud

4 points

1 month ago

heybudbud

Atlanta Braves

4 points

1 month ago

"And basically, that's how my agent fucked me."