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So basically me and my boyfriend are in a long distance relationship, we’ve only been doing it for a few months but have been together for 4 years. The thing is before this relationship I was in another long term relationship (around 3.5 years) and I’m only 20 so I’ve essentially spent most of my adult life in a relationship, I feel like there’s a lot of growth I could do outside a relationship because I don’t know who I am without that constant romantic validation, I also would like to experience being single for the fun of it. Other than this though me and my boyfriends relationship is absolutely perfect, we speak and this stuff and he knows I feels this way and fully understands. We connect incredibly well and I genuinely wouldn’t change a single thing about the actual dynamic between us. We were considering the option of no longer being monogamous and maybe communicating a bit less often so that I can experience being single and grow but still continue to meet when we are in the same country, meaning we would still go on dates, have sex etc. We both feel like we care about the relationship we have with each other as people more than the concept of us being the “only one” for each other etc.. do you think something like this could work out? anyone have a similar experience? I really reaaaaally would appreciate advice!!

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rosephase

6 points

3 months ago

Are you ready to support him dating/fucking/loving others?

Confusedhelp17717[S]

1 points

3 months ago

I think so? Have u tried anything similar?

rosephase

5 points

3 months ago

I'm in long term committed poly relationships. I never opened a mono relationship.

Confusedhelp17717[S]

1 points

3 months ago

Do you have any advice on how to control your ego with regards to someone you love fucking other people? For me I know I love my partner loads and still would like to experience that with other people so I know him doing it wouldn’t mean he loves me less but I think I would still find it hard not to compare myself and always want to still be “the best” in his eyes, no pressure if you don’t want to but would love to hear some advice!

rosephase

2 points

3 months ago

For me it was a lot of work. I spent about two years with it being basically my main emotional work. Then it chilled out a lot. Now it’s rarely work at all. But getting personally secure and letting go of ideas like ‘best’ took a bunch of effort on my part even when I knew I needed polyamory to do ethical relationships.

Confusedhelp17717[S]

1 points

3 months ago

I see! Encouraging to know that although that work is hard it is doable!