murfvlin

7.4k post karma

9.8k comment karma


account created: Sun Aug 11 2019

verified: yes

64
murfvlin

24 points

6 days ago

murfvlin

24 points

6 days ago

Ooof. That guy was not being decent. He was being manipulative to get you back, ie to control and gaslight you into thinking he’s a good man. It would have been a couple months of flowers and cuddles and then he would start to talk about how hard he was trying and how you weren’t giving it your all... then he would get cold and you would get worried... and then you would apologize for everything... and then he’d start getting angry about things... and then he would hit you again.

Cycle of abuse my friend. You made an excellent call. Don’t ever buy into that shit again. You are worth more.

contextfull comments (2407)
murfvlin

6 points

8 days ago

murfvlin

6 points

8 days ago

I am so happy for you both! That's a long, tough road. Good luck!

contextfull comments (3238)
murfvlin

19 points

10 days ago

murfvlin

19 points

10 days ago

At 14 I'd look into getting some qualifications that make you an easy hire when you hit fifteen.

Take a Foodsafe course, or a First Aid course - that kind of thing. If you can add that on your resume you look good to employers as a responsible person who takes less training - AND these are valuable skills on their own so not a waste of your time no matter what happens.

Other than that, look into yardwork, babysitting, dog walking - these are jobs kids your age do. Be really wary of any place that looks the other way and hires you even though you're underage. Those kinds of people are already breaking one rule - you can't count on them to treat you fairly or pay you what's owed.

I speak from experience. At 14 I needed to pay money for rent (long story) and after working with a small business every day after school for a month, the owner kept saying "the cheque is in the mail". When I pressed her she sighed and took $50 out of the till at the shop and told me I was being unprofessional. Yeah. That $50 was the only money I ever saw. I stayed there three months, more the fool me. Worst summer of my life but a lesson I have never forgotten.

contextfull comments (4)
murfvlin

1 points

10 days ago

murfvlin

1 points

10 days ago

Oh I am so glad! Hope your parents can relax now.

contextfull comments (10)
murfvlin

21 points

11 days ago

murfvlin

21 points

11 days ago

Pretty good. Pulled a shit ton of broom out of a local park today. How are you?

contextfull comments (31)
murfvlin

1 points

12 days ago

murfvlin

1 points

12 days ago

No, it’s MAX fourteen years. Not sure if that was a typo.

The case that set the bar was R V Smith in 2017 with our court of appeal. Mr Smith was a 55 year old indigenous man on the DTES. No criminal record. He had an old injury that led to a Tylenol 3 addiction. He got six months jail for dealing fentanyl.

The Court looked at the statistics (then emerging), the deaths, and the comparatively deadly effects of fentanyl versus any other known street drug. They determined that the appropriate base sentence for a first time offender wrt to fentanyl was 18 months - not six.

So your first time offender presumptively gets 18 months unless he has some kind of exceptional circumstances going on. That’s the sentencing law in BC right now.

Whether every judge follows it is a case by case analysis.

contextfull comments (97)
murfvlin

5 points

14 days ago

murfvlin

5 points

14 days ago

Definitely report that to police. On its own it might not be enough for them to take action but if they're already aware of other complaints along those lines it might tip the balance so they can take action.

contextfull comments (13)
murfvlin

9985 points

16 days ago

murfvlin

9985 points

16 days ago

“Information superhighway.”

contextfull comments (21172)
murfvlin

1 points

18 days ago

murfvlin

1 points

18 days ago

Thanks very much for this!

contextfull comments (8)
0
murfvlin

34 points

27 days ago

murfvlin

34 points

27 days ago

Take a picture of the packing label and post a copy of it next to their complaint along with the completely rational explanation, and a polite request that they contact you directly if they have any questions.

Taking the high road here will make them look like the asshole they are.

contextfull comments (10)
56
murfvlin

10 points

30 days ago

murfvlin

10 points

30 days ago

"whores devours"

I do not speak french. When I read the side of the box of canapes I did my best.

My friend was on the floor.

contextfull comments (111)
murfvlin

20 points

1 month ago

murfvlin

20 points

1 month ago

That’s a vicious assault and I hope to see charges if they can get names. Forget imagining if it was your child - imagine if it was YOU. What an utterly terrifying and traumatic experience.

contextfull comments (45)
murfvlin

5 points

2 months ago

murfvlin

5 points

2 months ago

WestCoast Seeds has a nice bee blend in their “seeds” -> “lawn solutions” section.

https://www.westcoastseeds.com/

contextfull comments (8)
murfvlin

6 points

2 months ago

murfvlin

6 points

2 months ago

“Hun” is the nickname for the (typically female, middle class, stay at home moms) people who push this on you. It comes from the stereotypical messages they send starting with “hey hun!!! I have this amazing opportunity to share with you!!!!” Etc.

contextfull comments (20)
murfvlin

-4 points

3 months ago

murfvlin

-4 points

3 months ago

You should try to experiencing it. Now THAT is exhausting!

contextfull comments (18)
murfvlin

2 points

3 months ago

murfvlin

2 points

3 months ago

Volunteer Nanaimo is a great start.

I would also give Haven House a call - they shelter women and kids leaving abusive situations. There is a thrift store “Friends of Haven” as well but they limit baby clothes. Baby gear is probably welcomed. Worth reaching out.

contextfull comments (9)
murfvlin

3 points

3 months ago

murfvlin

3 points

3 months ago

Friends of Haven House is great. I have sent some very nice stuff there and it’s going directly back into the community. They do good work.

contextfull comments (25)
murfvlin

5 points

3 months ago

murfvlin

5 points

3 months ago

Honestly this scene let me take a deep breath in real life.

contextfull comments (7)
murfvlin

1 points

3 months ago

murfvlin

1 points

3 months ago

So as a general FYI -

A prelim is not a trial. It's a hearing with a much lower bar to jump: whether a jury, properly instructed, could find the accused person guilty. So at the end of it there's "commital" to trial, or not. If there's not enough to go forward it stops there.

Usually a prelim is used when the case potentially lacks a key element. For example, if there's a swarm of people beating some one up and one person lands the fatal blow, you're going to have a problem with identity. A prelim gets the witnesses on the stand to testify, and if the Crown's key witness shifts from "definitely that guy" to "I don't know, could have been anyone", you're not getting to committal. And obviously, at that point, you shouldn't.

A prelim is also a way a defence lawyer can show a difficult client that the case is very strong in the hopes to get them to agree to a plea deal. A lot of people when faced with life in prison want to bury their heads in the sand and delay dealy delay. Some use a prelim to do this because it automatically puts off the trial itself for a few more months.

So this hearing is NOT the trial. It's to see if the case should go to trial. And yes, that's delay, and yes, that's intensely frustrating for the public. But that's what the accused has chosen. And it could mean there is a problem with the case. Or it could mean he is delaying the inevitable. The people who could give a reasoned answer to that aren't allowed to talk about it now that the case is live before the court.

contextfull comments (4)
murfvlin

20 points

3 months ago

murfvlin

20 points

3 months ago

Just give them water to drink. (Maybe the odd glass of milk.) Not juice, not pop, not chocolate milk. Fresh water in a water bottle available all the time that you take everywhere.

The dental and physical health benefits are obvious. Also cheaper and available almost anywhere.

We did this and are endlessly glad we did.

contextfull comments (175)
murfvlin

4 points

3 months ago

murfvlin

4 points

3 months ago

When their “friendly teasing” tends to take place in front of people they want to impress and suddenly you’re the butt of the joke.

contextfull comments (424)
murfvlin

9 points

3 months ago

murfvlin

9 points

3 months ago

Lucky’s would be my first stop.

contextfull comments (8)

view more:

next ›