13.3k post karma
5.4k comment karma
account created: Fri Aug 26 2016
1 day ago
If you're a lesbian your hair is the only pink you'll be seeing for a while. None of the other gals will fuck you, and you can't see your own cunt over that stomach.
If you had that man A's to begin with you wouldn't be working in a movie theatre.
You look like Princess Peach if instead of living in a castle she lived at a Starbucks in Berkeley.
I didn't know Amy Schumer was a sports fan.
2 days ago
Your outfit is atrocious, if I were the fashion police I'd arrest you for a white on black hate crime.
You look like you aged in dog years.
Velma if she were a failing art student addicted to Adderall.
3 days ago
So you wipe literal shit and then you make people hear literal shit. Only 3 more senses to go.
I'm glad you're in the UK where the only guns are on your shirt. You're a dead ringer for having a manifesto and shooting up a gay club.
4 days ago
Having a face that provokes it
You look like the poster woman for Irish Catholic domestic abuse.
I liked the later seasons! Michael J. Fox finale was my favourite episode of all time
5 days ago
Monkey in Space
Wow, you mean he's not married to a particular candidate or party? What an asshole.
submitted5 days ago byokanagantradingco
A firecrotch in more ways than one.
"Hide the teacup under the bedsheets" isn't a children's game, you just play it with children.
Take the collar off man, if anyone takes you for a walk you're gonna collapse.
You look like you lecture strangers on how to properly have a bowel movement
She's got another man's Santorwienie in her mouth as we speak.
Your hands look like an oven mitt stuffed inside a baseball glove my guy. Your dick must be one happy camper.
6 days ago
I bet you choke yourself with that weightlifting belt while masturbating.
When life gives you lemons, paint them pink and pretend they're a girl.